Teen Wolf – 2.05 – Venomous

Jackson and Danny are all hot and sweaty together in the boy’s locker room, but despite the fact that this is pretty much the opening to every single porn ever, they’re just lifting weights.

Alas.

the most heterosexual image ever

the most heterosexual image ever

Jackson is struggling a little with the weights Danny has already racked up, but he still explodes angrily when Danny assists him. Jackson’s sure he should be able to lift more, unaided, and Danny thinks he’s being ridiculous. Jackson pouts prettily and Danny stalks off to take a shower.

Despite his inability to lift as much as he’d thought, Jackson’s senses are super heightened and driving him a little nuts. Between the dripping of the faucet and the clicking of the exhaust fan and his own heartbeat and the squeaky sound of Danny turning the shower on, Jackson is momentarily overwhelmed. He pulls himself together and goes back to his bench presses.

Unfortunately, he’s pretty screwed without a spotter, and can’t lift the barbell back up off his chest. As he struggles, a hand reaches down to help him out, and Jackson, assuming it’s Danny, actually says thank you for perhaps the first time in his life.

It’s not Danny, though – it’s Erica.

*****

Erica and Isaac drag Jackson down to Derek’s creepy subway hideout for some super fun interrogation times. Derek wants to know what happened to Jackson on the night of the full moon, and he doesn’t believe a word of Jackson’s story that nothing happened at all. Jackson swears that he’s telling the truth, and offers to show them the videotape. Everyone finds this pretty hilarious, because COME ON JACKSON you are a ridiculous narcissistic gitface and everyone knows it. Jackson has an actualfax full-on toddler hissyfit, snarling in Isaac’s face that he didn’t get his special gift like he was promised. Aww, poor baby.

Jackson offers to go get the video and show them, and Derek seems to consider it for about 2 seconds, but he’s actually got something else planned for Jackson instead. I’m sure it won’t be horrible and painful in any way.

Derek picks up a broken shard of mirror in his cleverly gloved hands and sort of caresses it creepily and reflects some light into Jackson’s eyes. Jackson finds this terrifying, which seems silly considering how much time he spends leering at his own glorious reflection in the mirror.

Erica and Isaac shove Jackson to his knees, and Erica yanks his head back. Derek supervillains up to Jackson with the mirror shard, taunting him that he’s always been a snake, and everyone knows that a snake can’t be poisoned by its own venom. Derek pours a drop of the Kanima’s poison from the mirror shard into Jackson’s mouth, and they wait to see his reaction.

It’s not the one they’re looking for, unfortunately – Jackson slumps over onto the floor and twitches, paralyzed and helpless. Derek looks extremely frustrated for a moment and tells Jackson that while he might be a snake, he’s not the one they’re looking for.

Derek Hale, ladies and gentlemen. Planner Extraordinaire. Because kidnapping and poisoning is way easier than just, oh I don’t know, sitting outside his house at night to see if he changes into a hideous lizard beast that runs around killing people? Maybe?

From now on I shall mentally be calling this show People In Beacon Hills Making Questionable Decisions.

Erica and Derek leave Jackson quivering sweatily on the floor, and just before he joins them, Isaac stoops down to inform Jackson that he’s going to have to do an important favor for him.

*****

This favor is for Jackson to walk into the police station and tell Sheriff Stilinski that he lied about seeing Isaac and Mr Lahey arguing before Mr Lahey was murdered. Sheriff Stilinski can’t believe that this horrible kid is ruining his carefully researched and formulated murder case.

*****

Stiles runs into class the next morning to tell Scott that he’s heard from his dad that Jackson did A Bad Thing, but Scott already knows, because Isaac is sitting right in front of them like he wasn’t just a fugitive murder suspect for the last few weeks. Oh, and of course he can hear their entire conversation. He seems to find it quite amusing.

ruh roh

ruh roh

*****

After class, Stiles gives Scott the rundown on his unsuccessful foray into Kanima research – the only thing he was able to find online was something about a rare South American jaguar that only goes after murderers. Scott doesn’t think this is very helpful, since the creepy lizard thing is definitely no kind of jaguar, rare or not. Scott also thinks that maybe it’s trying to kill Stiles because Stiles saw it kill someone else, which presumably means it will keep trying until Stiles is dead. Thanks, Scott. You’re a great friend.

Meanwhile, Danny is telling Jackson that he’s found a program that should be able to restore the missing section of Jackson’s video. Jackson isn’t as pleased as you’d expect; mostly he just seems resigned. As Isaac and Erica walk by, Jackson’s heightened senses kick in again and he overhears their entire conversation: Isaac is looking forward to finding and killing someone, but Erica reminds him that they have to “test her first”.

*****

Later on, in econ class, Jackson sits down behind Stiles and Scott, looking for some answers. Unable to get their attention by calling them testicles, Jackson asks what they know about something called a Kanima. That gets them to turn around really fast.

Coach Finstock sighs dreamily about how terrible tomorrow’s midterm is going to be, and calls up students to solve problems on the blackboard. Jackson continues his rant at Stiles and Scott in a pissy undertone, whining about how being paralyzed from the neck down by gross supernatural poison is like the worst thing ever. Stiles does indeed have some familiarity with this situation, Jackson, so STFU.

Scott can’t figure out why anyone would have thought that Jackson was the Kanima, and Stiles is worried that suspicion has now fallen on Lydia as the next possible candidate. But all Jackson heard was Erica and Isaac planning to “test” her somehow.

Finstock interrupts their conversation grumpily, forcing Jackson to salvage the situation with some well-times sucking up. As soon as Finstock walks away, Scott asks Stiles how they’re supposed to be sure it actually ISN’T Lydia they’re looking for. Stiles thinks that when he looked into the Kanima’s eyes, what he saw was pure evil; Lydia, however, is probably only 50% evil.

I think this is probably the most accurate and most logical argument presented thus far in the entirety of this series, tbh. Scott does not concur. Whatever, McCall, it’s not like you’ve shown a lot of critical thinking skills lately. Or maybe ever. Stiles insists that Lydia’s fine.

It seems that actually Lydia might not be doing as well as Stiles thinks. As she stares absentmindedly at the student completing a problem on the blackboard, she glances over at the other side of the board. Instead of math problems, it’s covered with equations written in a spiral across the board, and the man standing there with the chalk doesn’t look much like Coach Finstock. It looks rather a lot like Peter Hale.

As Lydia watches him write, she realizes that everyone in class has turned around to stare at her creepily. Lydia starts getting extremely uncomfortable and nervous. A moment later and she appears to be alone in the classroom, and Peter turns from the board and starts throwing empty desks out of the way to get to her. Lydia runs to the back of the room and shivers, trying not to scream aloud, and Peter shoves her up against the wall to blow a handful of dust into her eyes.

NOW KISS!

NOW KISS!

Lydia suddenly regains her senses and is standing up at the blackboard holding the chalk. She’s covered the entire board with creepy mirror writing that says SOMEONEHELPME, which none of her fellow students seem to be able to read. (I think maybe the low test scores in Beacon Hills were not actually the fault of the former principal after all – I think it’s just that everyone is kind of dumb.)
Lydia’s friendly stalker from outside Ms Morrell’s office is seated in the front row of the class, and he’s the only one who looks sympathetic to her humiliation.

In the back of the room, Scott and Stiles and Jackson are all staring at her with a combination of confusion and concern. Scott, hilariously, thinks the words are written in Greek. (Scott, way to prove my point.) Alas, even Stiles can’t figure out what it says without taking a photo of it and reversing the image. I am embarrassed for everyone in this high school.

*****

On their way to chem class, Scott and Stiles try to figure out when Derek’s going to grab Lydia and test her with the venom. Erica and Isaac enter from the other end of the classroom and it seems pretty obvious that the testing is about to begin. Stiles and Scott run to sit next to Lydia and deflect any wolfy interference, but Erica and Isaac seem more amused than irritated by their attempts. Allison gives Scott an odd look as she sits down, and he directs her attention towards Erica and her gloriously uncaring smirk of wolfy superiority.

Mr Harris, the worst teacher in the history of the universe and I am including Severus Snape in this collection, makes some bitchy little remarks about how he thinks Stiles is stupid, which tbh is all it takes to get on my shitlist lately. Mr Harris splits up the entire class for group experiments, and seats Erica at the first station. Pretty much every single guy in the room and a few of the girls volunteer to be her partner, but Harris pairs her up with Scott instead.

Scott tells Erica to wait on whatever she’s planning to do to Lydia, and let Scott talk to Derek first. Erica gets all up in Scott’s business instead, laughing at how he and Allison pretend to be broken up during school but are obviously still making out after school. Oh Erica, didn’t anyone ever teach you it’s not nice to sniff boys?

Scott tries to deny it, and Erica counters by groping his thigh. Scott doesn’t know what the hell to do with himself. Behind them, Lydia points this out to Allison and asks why she isn’t jealous. Don;t be silly, Lydia, anyone can see Scott is barely holding back from stabbing Erica in the face.

As they switch stations, Allison warns Lydia not to talk to Erica. Meanwhile, Stiles finds himself sitting next to Isaac. He tries to threaten Isaac, which Isaac finds hilarious. They taunt each other for a while until Isaac threatens to kill Lydia.

The next move pairs up Lydia with Isaac and Erica with Allison. Allison asks Erica what they’re going to do to Lydia, but Erica is more concerned with what Lydia might do to them if it turns out she really IS the Kanima.

Lydia is definitely starting to feel conspired against, and throws Allison a few worried glances over her shoulder. Erica decides her next plan of attack is to try to make Allison think that Scott’s planning to break up with her, but Allison knows this for the stupidest ploy in the book.

And then Erica gropes Allison’s thigh under the table and idek what to do.

i know this is meant to seem threatening but all i feel is happy in pants

i know this is meant to seem threatening but all i feel is happy in pants

Mr Harris announces to the class that if they’ve completed their experiments correctly, they should now have a crystal that they can actually eat. Lydia and Isaac seem to be the only ones who got it right, and Lydia reaches for the crystal, taking it from Isaac, who as slimed it with venom. She puts it into her mouth before Scott or Stiles can stop her, getting the venom all over her tongue.

Scott yells Lydia’s name, and she takes the crystal out of her mouth to stare at him like he’s a moron. Everyone waits for her to collapse from paralysis, but instead, she just crunches down on the crystal like it’s the tasty bones of her vanquished enemies. And absolutely nothing happens.

Scott glances out the window into the parking lot, and all the way at the back, Derek is standing next to his car like a creepy weird lurker.

*****

After class, Scott, Stiles, and Allison meet up in the locker room to work out their next move. Since Derek is waiting outside the school, he’s presumably there to kill Lydia if Erica and Isaac tell her she was immune to the Kanima’s venom.

Stiles still insists that it can’t be Lydia, but Allison can see the larger picture – it doesn’t matter if it really IS Lydia or not, because now Derek will believe that it is definitely her. So either they have to convince him that he’s wrong, or they have to protect Lydia somehow. Allison decides to check the bestiary again, because even though it’s written in Archaic Latin, she thinks she might know someone who can translate it. Scott grumpily volunteers to try to talk some sense into Derek, which I am sure will go swimmingly.

Scott tells Allison and Stiles that whatever happens, they need to let him handle it himself, because they can’t heal from horrible wounds like he can. Allison looks at him like he chewed up her favourite shoes, and then removes a small crossbow from her handbag, telling him that she can take care of herself. YOU SO FIERCE GURL.

Scott tries to pull himself together enough to explain himself to Allison without her freaking out. He just wants her to be okay and not get hurt. I feel like some wild slobbery making out may occur at any moment, but luckily there’s no time for that.

As Scott turns to leave, he hears the twang of the bow behind his back, and he spins around just in time to catch the bolt before it hits him in the face. This is what happens when you leave weapons unattended around Stiles, y’all.

MISTAKES HAVE BEEN MADE

MISTAKES HAVE BEEN MADE

*****

Lydia is sitting in Ms Morrell’s office suffering through a tedious battery of psychological tests. As Ms Morrell holds up each Rorschach card, Lydia barely glances at them before saying they look like butterflies. After half a dozen or so, Ms Morrell holds up one that looks like Peter Hale’s charred corpse. Lydia stares at it for a beat, startled, and then goes back into butterfly mode. Ms Morrell is not impressed. She asks Lydia what it’s going to take to get her to open up, and Lydia denies any sort of subterfuge. Looking back down at the card she’s just held up, Ms Morrell says that she thinks it looks more like a wolf.

*****

Matt sits down in the library with Danny and Jackson – he’s done some thinking about the video situation and has a couple of questions for Jackson. Is there anyone that has a key to Jackson’s house that also has the skills to do some sneaky video editing? Danny admits that he could have done it, since he knows how Jackson’s mom forgets to lock the kitchen door. Matt admits that he could have done it, since it’s his camera in the first place. Hell, Matt and Danny could have done it together! That may have come out slightly more suggestively than Matt intended, and Danny seems intrigued. Jackson seems judgmental, as usual.

o hai

o hai

Matt heads off to his next class, and Jackson teases Danny about his little crush. Danny insists that it doesn’t matter, because he knows Matt has a thing for Allison. Jackson doesn’t seem to care about this interesting piece of gossip, but Danny’s next question – if there’s anyone else who can get into his house – kind of floors him.

As Lydia walks into the library with Stiles right behind her, Jackson realizes that there is actually someone else to whom he’s given a key.

*****

When Allison said she had someone in mind to help translate the bestiary, I was definitely not thinking she was going to take it to Ms Morrell, but here we are. Ms Morrell looks at the printout like it’s pure craziness, which is not an unfair assessment. Allison smiles and claims that it’s an old family heirloom, and Ms Morrell laughs and tells her she has an “interesting family”. This, of course, is the understatement of the year.

Ms Morrell says she’s familiar with most Romance languages, but this seems beyond her. Allison asks her to try anyway, and Ms Morrell gives her a vague translation that the Kanima is like a wolf with its power greatest at the moon’s peak. She also says that the Kanima is a social creature, and it seeks a friend. Allison can’t figure out what this means, and Ms Morrell says that maybe it’s just lonely.

*****

Scott heads out to the lacrosse field for an attempt at peace talks with Derek. Instead, he finds Boyd, and tells him he wants to talk with Derek. Boyd isn’t feeling very helpful and chooses to loom menacingly over Scott instead. Even though Boyd is twice the size of Scott, Scott is definitely twice as fast.

Before they can get too excited about rolling around in the dirt together, Derek appears and tells Scott that Lydia failed their totally scientific test for Kanima-ness, and he’s just going to have to accept that. Scott still thinks that this doesn’t prove anything, and says he won’t let Derek kill her. Derek smirks at him obnoxiously and tells him that he wasn’t planning to do it himself.

*****

Inside the school, Erica and Isaac are prancing down the hallway like snarly supermodels.

*****

Scott realizes his mistake and turns to run inside, and Boyd just knocks him right onto his ass. Derek monologues supervillainishly at Scott, mocking him for thinking he has to protect everyone all the time. He’s sure that Lydia is the one who has been killing people, and that she’ll do it again as soon as she gets the chance. Scott still doesn’t want to believe it, though.

Derek explains, finally, that it’s a shapeshifter just like them, and that sometimes the shape things take reflect the person they are inside. Scott thinks back over years of unpleasant interactions with Lydia and seems to find Derek’s statement at least somewhat reasonable, but another possibility occurs to him immediately – what if Lydia is somehow immune? Immune to both the bite and to the venom?

Derek thinks this is total bullshit that Scott has randomly pulled out of his ass. He’s never seen or heard of anything like that before, and it seems like he’d be the one to know. But when Scott reminds him how the bite didn’t take with Jackson, Derek looks stunned.

*****

Matt and Danny are sitting together in the library again. Danny’s running a program to restore the missing video footage, and Matt’s scrolling through some photos on his tablet from the lacrosse game the night before. He’s worried that there’s some kind of weird glitch in his camera, because all the photos he took of Scott have a burst of lens flare over his face.

*****

Apparently it’s just occurred to Scott that Derek’s given Jackson the bite, and that nothing came of it. Scott remembers Peter saying that if the bite doesn’t turn you, it kills you, and further realizes that Derek has no clue why the bite didn’t take with Jackson. Scott’s sure that this means that Lydia has some kind of immunity that she’s passed on to Jackson.

gratuitous photo of hoechlin because of reasons

gratuitous photo of hoechlin because of reasons

Derek doesn’t care about Scott’s flaily accusations, because he’s determined that Lydia has to die. Scott had been hoping to convince him otherwise, but he’s also made a backup plan.

*****

Erica and Isaac strut into the library, but the only people they see are Danny and Matt. Isaac yanks Matt to his feet and demands to know where Lydia is. Matt, of course, has no idea what’s going on, or who Isaac is even talking about.

At the other end of the library, Stiles and Allison are dragging Lydia out the door and down the hall, followed by Jackson. They’ve fed her some story about a study group, and Lydia doesn’t understand why a study group would meet somewhere other than a library. Stiles tells her that they’re meeting someone else as well, and when Lydia starts pointing out how that argument is rubbish as well, Jackson grabs her arm and hauls her away even faster.

*****

Scott is running down the hall on his way to meet up with them and is delayed by Coach Finstock, who waves some damaged lacrosse gear in his face and demands an explanation.

*****

Outside, Stiles has shoved everyone into his jeep, and they’re speeding out of the parking lot. Lydia’s squashed up against the rear window wondering how this confusing ridiculousness suddenly became a part of her life.

halp

halp

*****

Finstock lectures Scott that as co-captain of the lacrosse team, he has certain responsibilities, like making sure everyone’s equipment is in good shape. Coach Finstock found a bunch of mangled gear stuffed behind the bleachers, and now the responsible player is going to have to pay for them. Scott inspects the gear and realizes that it belongs to Danny.

*****

Stiles pulls up outside of Scott’s house and hurries everyone inside. Lydia’s still full of totally valid questions – if they’re all studying at Scott’s house, why isn’t Scott even there? Stiles says Scott will be meeting them there eventually, and all but throws Lydia inside.

Behind them, Allison thanks Jackson for helping them out, but as usual, Jackson has an ulterior motive, as he’d wanted to talk to Lydia about something anyway.

Once inside, Stiles locks every possible lock on every possible door and then peeks out the front window in a really not casual study group way. Lydia watches him suspiciously and he covers it up by saying there’s been a few break-ins in the neighborhood. The chair he shoves under the doorknob makes her much more suspicious, but she’s probably used to Stiles’ weirdness by now. Allison bites her lip and tries not to crack up unhelpfully.

Jackson asks Lydia to come talk with him somewhere else in the house, and despite her mounting irritation, she follows him.

*****

Scott is shoving through the crowd of departing students to go back inside the school. Matt’s on his way out, and stops Scott for a candid photo on the steps. Scott dismisses this as just one more random weird thing he has to deal with today and continues up the stairs. Once he’s gone, Matt checks out the photo he just took and sees that the glare from Scott’s eyes is the same.

*****

Jackson takes Lydia into Scott’s bedroom to talk. She seems to be expecting some kind of relationship reconciliation, but all Jackson wants to know is if she still has the spare key he gave her when they were dating. Lydia seems incredibly offended that this is the conversation she’s been tricked into having, and Jackson is just as annoyed that she didn’t give it back immediately when they broke up.

Lydia rages at him that she’d been attacked by a maniac who bit her and left her unconscious in the hospital, and then spent two days in a fugue state wandering naked in the woods, how can Jackson expect her to care about something as silly as a house key? Jackson is unmoved by her shouting and asks her if she has the key or not, and Lydia says that she doesn’t have it.

Jackson stares at her for a moment, noticing the sweat on her brow and her rapid heartbeat, and accuses her of lying to him. Lydia looks really cornered and nervous.

*****

Scott eventually locates Danny, still sitting in the library waiting for Jackson’s video to finish restoring. Scott tosses the ruined lacrosse gear down on the table, and Danny is outraged, asking him what he did to the gear. Scott’s confused, since he thought Danny was the one who tore everything up, and Danny reminds him that the last time they played, Danny was the goalie, using different gear. Scott tries to figure out who was wearing Danny’s stuff, but he’s sidelined by a call from Allison telling him that he needs to get home ASAP. Derek and his betas are standing outside the house menacingly.

Scott runs out of the library to save the day. Danny, busy with his homework, doesn’t notice that a section of the restored video is playing on his computer. In it, Jackson sits up on his bed and stares at the camera, his eyes glowing and gold.

DRAMATIC MUSIC!

*****

Stiles and Allison peek out the front window hopefully, but Derek and the rest of the pack are still there. Allison gets out her phone and starts playing with it nervously – she’s thinking about calling her dad for help, even though this will mean he finds out that she and Scott are still secretly seeing one another. Allison thinks it’s the only thing they can do to save Lydia.

*****

In the bedroom, Jackson is angrily interrogating Lydia about his key. He accuses her of editing the videotape, telling her that she came to his house on the night of the full moon, saw what was happening to him, and stole the videotape to edit out the most important part, just to ruin Jackson’s life like she always does.

Words seriously cannot describe the epic WTFingF expression on Lydia’s face.

plz stahp jackson

plz stahp jackson

She just has no goddamn clue what the hell Jackson is ranting about. What’s more, it seems like she’s starting to suspect that he’s completely insane. Jackson backs up from his mania for a moment to say that maybe she just did it to protect him, but – back to the crazy – it was totally her because she is the worst ruiner in the history of ruining ruiners who ruin things! Waaah!

Lydia stares him right in the eye and tells him she doesn’t know what the hell he’s talking about, but if he needs the key so badly, she’ll give it to him. And yes, she’s had it all along, on a chain around her neck. She takes the chain off and shoves the key into his hand. Jackson looks like he might be reconsidering his crazyface rant.

Lydia stares at him miserably and tells him that she hates him, and Jackson knows that she’s lying about this too. She counters that she should hate him, and turns away when he touches her face, but she is no match for his sinister attraction!

sexytimes

sexytimes

How come Jackson and Lydia can make out without making juicy sloppy dog-eating-peanut-butter noises like Scott and Allison do? Someone should look into this before season three starts.

As Lydia grabs the back of Jackson’s neck to pull him closer, his shirt collar is shoved aside, and we see that the skin is turning green and scaly right before our eyes.

GIRL YOU IN DANGER.

Up front, Stiles and Allison are getting more and more concerned. Stiles tells Allison to just shoot one of the pack with her crossbow. Stiles’ reasoning is that since the pack doesn’t think they’re going to fight, if Allison shoots one of them they’ll all run away.

This is maybe your worst plan yet, well done Stiles.

Stiles thinks she should shoot Derek, and Allison reminds him that if Scott was able to catch an arrow shot at his head, Derek will definitely be able to do so as well. Stiles tells her to just pick one of the remaining three wolves and shoot one already, but they then notice that Derek is now accompanied by only two of his betas – Isaac is missing. Ruh roh.

Of course Isaac is right behind them. He knocks the crossbow out of Allison’s hand and knocks Stiles onto his ass.

*****+

In the bedroom, Jackson and Lydia are still making out when they hear the crashing of Isaac’s asskickery. Lydia goes to the door to check out the hallway, and as soon as she’s gone, Jackson starts shifting even more.

Downstairs, Isaac is dragging Stiles around and snarling creepily. Allison tells Lydia that someone is trying to break in and that she has to go and hide. Lydia runs back to Scott’s bedroom, calling for Jackson, but he’s gone. Also, the bedroom window is open.

Lydia locks herself in Scott’s bathroom and tries (and fails) not to freak out hysterically. Being perhaps the only sane person in the situation, Lydia pulls out her phone and calls 911 for help. As the phone connects, the lights in the bathroom go out.

Allison bursts into Scott’s room with her crossbow ready to shoot, and locks the door behind her. She sees the open window dripping with snotty lizard venom and shouts to Stiles that the Kanima is already there. A noise outside the bedroom door alerts Allison seconds before Erica kicks the door open. Erica laughs nastily at Allison when she sees the crossbow at her, and tells her she’s always wondered what it would be like to steal someone’s boyfriend. Oh Erica, you are so ridiculous. It’s not that you’re not absolutely gorgeous, but there is no way Scott McCall would ever look at anyone on the entire earth who wasn’t Allison. It’s sort of sad that you can’t see this.

Allison’s response to this ridiculous taunting is to pull the trigger. Erica catches the arrow easily and laughs at Allison some more – did she really think that was going to work?

Things have actually gone exactly as Allison had planned, because when Erica caught the arrow, she also caught herself a huge gooey handful of Kanima venom. Seconds later, Erica is paralyzed, and now Allison’s the one laughing.

Oh my god I love her forever.

*****

Derek and Boyd are still standing outside the house, listening to the crashy smashy sounds within. Derek seems pretty pleased with how the evening’s going so far, until the front door of the house opens and Erica and Isaac are thrown violently outside. Now it is time for Derek’s little grumpy puppy face which I will share with you now, because I love you.

puppy has bad day

puppy has bad day

It looks like Scott showed up just in time, hooray! He and Stiles and Allison come out onto the porch and stare Derek down triumphantly.

Derek tells Scott that he’s realized why Scott keeps refusing to join him – it’s because Scott isn’t an Omega, he’s already the Alpha of his own pack. But either way, Scott’s not going to be able to beat him.

Oh Derek, Scott doesn’t have to beat you, he just has to keep you busy until the police arrive. Derek’s not too keen on spending more time in police custody, naturally. Before Derek can fight or flee, they hear a familiar hissing sound coming from above them – the Kanima is crawling creepily across the roof of the house. It dives off the side and then runs away.

Derek tells Boyd to get Erica and Isaac away from the house, and gets ready to chase after the Kanima. Once Lydia storms out of the house to yell at them all, everyone just stops and stares, finally realizing that it’s been Jackson the whole time.

*****

Down a nearby street, Jackson slithers creepily up to a parked car with an Einstein bumper sticker. He raises his lizardy hand to the driver’s side window, and the driver of the car places their hand over his through the window. This creepy touch seems to communicate something to Jackson, and he lizards off into the night as the car drives away.

I wonder if Derek is ever going to admit that Scott was right all along.

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