Game of Thrones 3.9 – The Rains of Castamere

(Last episode, before my heart was destroyed.) GUYS WHAT. WHAT.  What.  WHAT?!!  Hey, I asked you a question.  I ASKED YOU WHAAAAAT ON EARTH DID I JUST WATCH?! WHAT DID THEY DO TO  MEEEEEEEE? Accurate depiction of me during the last ten minutes of the episode:


I just—

So I just have to talk about this, huh? All the stuff before? Wait, Jorah was sexy with a sword and Daario was smirky and delicious, OKAY I CAN DO THIS. (JFC, I am shaking and crying, and I freaking love this show and haters to the left or whatever kids say these days and seriously. SERIOUSLY. No one is safe. I thought I understood, guys, but I didn’t understand until now. And now I walk as nothing more than a breathing shadow, because clearly I cannot allow myself to love anyone, because now I know they will be taken from me. I know this now. [pounds chest, weeps])

Punches: not being pulled. GOT IT. And CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE LANNISTERS OH MY G-  Which is a perfect segue into the beginning, WOW SHOW, where we see Robb, his map, and a weetiny doodle of Casterly Rock.

Robb has apparently FedEx’d a few new game pieces for his War Board as we see a giant wooden X with a man hanging on it (and OH. Okay. Yep, I get it. This is who is holding Theon: House Bolton of the Flayed Man) and the other addition of an iron (seeming) tower to represent the Twins. I’m thinking recession/revolution-proof businesses in Westeros are caskets, “so your village was pillaged and burned, and you want to try again” starter kits, and giant wooden game pieces for warlords’ strategic maps. (Where are they getting these?  Are there Royal Strategic War Map Carvers or something?)

Irrelevant! Robb finally wants his mom’s advice about what to do, since he borked the whole Frey Oath thing, etc. They both realize that they can succeed at taking Casterly Rock if—and it’s seemingly a mostly sure thing—Argus Walder Filch-Frey cooperates. Otherwise, “We’ll lose the war and die the way Father died. Or worse.”

PLEASE NOTE  THE CLOSE UP ON THE GAME PIECES. The wolves are facing the Lannisters, and at the wolves’ back stand the Flayed Man and Twins. Wow. Right at their back, ready to stab, huh? Take a drink every time there’s foreshadowing. (Get a backup liver on call.) And wow #2, okay, Karstark said plainly before losing his head a la Oliver Cromwell, “You lost this war when you married [Talisa.]” DRINK.

Robb’s direwolf (eee, puppy!) leads the lot of Starks and their remaining bannermen to the Twins, and interesting how Filch-Frey gives them bread and salt: salt is a sign of wealth, but it’s also what you spread generously to destroy and keep from ever coming back. “Salt the earth so nothing can grow.” DRINK.

Robb apologizes to Frey for the whole falling in love with someone else thing, but Frey makes him apologize to the Frey women, named like they’re George Foreman’s kids. (Waldera, Waldero, Waldera II, Derawal, Derawall XXV, etc.) Frey then calls Talisa to stand before him, and Cat makes Robb allow it when Frey is totally disgusting about her body, how he’d like to tap that ass, and how he gets that Robb was thinking with a stiff one and not his honor. Ouch. All of the McPoyles (Frey’s inbred family) stand around gawping at her, too.

But Cat knows they have to let Frey’s anger run out so they can move on. Oh, Cat. You weren’t thinking big enough. (But who would!?) Frey then says, “The wine will flow red, the music will be loud, and we’ll put this mess behind us.” WOW. DRINK.

Dany has her own war council that apparently Daario is allowed to be a part of now. (We last saw him with a bag o’heads—newest enemy expansion pack!—invading her bath and swearing an oath.) They’re looking at a map – she doesn’t have fancy game piece carvers, it seems – and Jorah is pushed aside so that Daario can stand really close to her and move her hand right to the magic spot. If you listen closely, you can hear the sound of Jorah’s heart breaking. I mean, I can smell the lust off these two young long-haired hotties through my tv screen; imagine what that must be like for Jorah. (“I loved her first!!”)

Daario’s plan: he sneaks into the whore house with Jorah and Grey Worm backing him up, they open the front gates, the army rolls in. Boom, the city will be hers. Jorah is all, “Uh, Seal Team 3 stuff means I’d have to trust you. And I don’t.” Grey Worm eyes Daario and sees something he can trust, however. Dany puts the plan in motion—Selmy will stay as Queensguard and Jorah will give his last breath for his Khalesi, if it comes to it. (It better not. IT HAD BETTER NOT.)

Red Leader Porkins and Gilly continue to push toward the Wall, but Porkins has them headed to one of the abandoned castles. He is at Expert Level Sneak, and clearly found a Castle Schematics skill book that leveled him up. He explains all of this book learning to her, which doesn’t translate. Scratches in a book made him this smart? “Yer a Wizard, Harry Samwell!” I love how these two represent the average Westeros citizen. They’re just trying to stay alive, trying to find a little goodness during the day. They don’t have huge plans or grand ideas beyond survival.

They finally get to where they can see the wall, and my hat’s off to the CGI/effects department, because it looks gorgeous. That is an impressive bit of man-building there.

The Hound and Arya are pushing toward the Twins as well, and meet a man with a wagon who happens to be headed inside. The Hound knocks him out and prepares to kill the guy when Arya stops him. “JFC, you don’t have to murder everyone you come across! You’re not so tough.”

The Hound: Are so!

Arya: A girl knows a man that is tough. A girl is not looking at him!

The Hound says she’s a very nice person. And that is going to get her killed some day. She knocks the wagon-man out again in a huff and stomps back to their horse.

I could be an assassin if I WANTED to be.  :( ...wait, it's %(

I could be an assassin if I WANTED to be.
:(     …wait, it’s   %(

She finds him a while later eating all of the pigs’ feet that the wagon was carrying, and tells him to get a move on, hopping from foot to foot. He knows what that’s all about, though: she’s terrified. Nuh uh!

Uh huh! He knows fear, and she’s dripping with it. She’s so close to seeing her family (and she’s been alone since episode 1.09!) and so close to having it all ruined, too. DRINK. He smirks about how scared she is, but she gets in his face.  She knows his big fear: fire. And she knows why. And one day she is going to put a sword through his eye and it will come out of the back of his head and she will not shed a tear. Arya? I love you, you spunky thing, you.

Bran, Rickon, Billy Elliot, Tough Sis, Tonks and Hodor arrive at a village close to the Wall called “The Gift.” Not much of one, seeing as it looks ransacked. The Wildlings raid it often—I mean, you name it “The Gift” and people are going to take that literally. There’s just the one guy living there who raises horses. A storm rolls in, so they all take to a small tower to ride it out.

Speaking of Wildlings, Gjördkr the Chîcken Eåter leads his band of men to a small stone wall where they spy a small farm and one man running it. The old man raises the horses for the Watch—it’s the same place that Bran and his group are! Jon wants the raiders to just take the horses and go, not kill the old man, but Gjördkr knows that it would be better for the Watch to attack them on this open field, not inside their castle.

They all run toward the hut to kill the man, but Jon smacks his sword against a stone to alert the horses and the Watch’s man. Ygritte is growing ever more suspicious—it seems that Jon Snow does know something, Ygritte, and he’s just not telling you. (And this was a perfect episode to call Jon a bastard, but no one did. Tchuh.)

Bran’s group, up in the tower, are trying to keep Hodor calm as thunder rolls over them. Quick, someone get Hodor a Thundershirt! They’re all trying to figure out how to get out of there safely, but Hodor borks it all up with his terror-whining. Outside, the Wildling’s Warg, aka Fedora-Wearing Nice Guy, hears the noise and grows suspicious. Bran does some hoodoo that involves his eyes going white and getting inside Hodor (M-O-O-N, that spells Hodor!) to shut him the hell up.

The Wildlings kill the old man’s horse before he can escape to call the alarm. The old man refuses to tell Gjördkr where he was going. Gjördkr is gentle with him here—they all know the old man will die, why be a dick about it? Did someone say “Be a dick, not a dude?” Because Nice Guy says, “Let’s get Jon Snow to kill him. Let him prove he’s really with us.”

Jon tries, but struggles with it. In the end, Ygritte arrows the old dude through the heart and this upsets everyone. He’s a crow! And Ygritte’s his crow-protecting wife! Gjördkr gets Ygritte and drags her off, because ultimately she’s a Wildling and a damn good fighter; they want to keep her. Jon fights off Wildlings, Bran inside is convinced by Billy Elliot to get inside his Direwolf and attack (and DOES), and Jon manages to stab Nice Guy through the heart. He whispers into Nice Guy’s ear, “You were right all along.”

This is what happens when you continually call someone a bastard, guys.

This is what happens when you continually call someone a bastard, guys.

And with his last dying breath, Nice Guy sends a falcon to attack Jon’s face NOT FALCON FACED, NOOOO!  Jon fights the bird off (or was that a golden eagle? Not that it matters) and manages to get away on a horse. LEAVING YGRITTE, NOOOOO times two! (Will he regret leaving Ygritte? Hurr.)

Zooming all the way down to Yunkai, the overhead shot is gorgeous, and almost looks like the city is burning. Daario tells Jorah and Grey Worm to wait for his signal, a bird call. And he’s like a champion bird caller and stuff.

“CAW, CAW!” Daario screeches, and the two men run in to find the guards dead. Easy peasy, nice and—WAIT, HERE COME A DOZEN MORE. The three men look amazing wielding their scimitars, speared staffs and swords, taking the soldiers out like a boss. Several bosses. A quorum? Jorah is about to wipe off his blade (after some seriously gorgeous sword work) to say something like, “That was a close one!” when more soldiers pour over the wall. SHIT. Was this an ambush planned by Daario? BECAUSE WE KNOW THERE’S AN AMBUSH COMING. this the ambush? Does she have a face like a gargoyle?

…is this the ambush? Does she have a face like a gargoyle? Or a gun in the bathroom a la Michael Corleone?

*cough* At the Twins, Frey walks his daughter down the aisle, but we can’t see her face through the intricate veil. Is she hiding a foot growing out of her face? Are there teeth surrounding one eye? What monstrous beast lies within?  Edmure gulps, waiting for it to come off and…oh, she’s lovely! Frey was able to squirt out something human, how nice! They go through the ceremony without a problem. (Blackfish tries not to catch the eye any of the old unmarried Frey women, lol.)

Catch your breath here, guys. Bran, happy that he was able to enter his Direwolf Summer’s mind, isn’t as happy as Billy Elliot (Jojen). Jojen is unbelievably happy that Bran can enter men. HEY-O, they’re teens and that’s wrong of me. No warg has ever been able to get inside a person’s mind, so clearly Bran is no regular warg. Bran tells Tonks that he’s pushing north of the Wall, and she’s to take Rickon to Castle Black and/or their bannermen. Rickon is heartsick over this, because they were the last Stark kids to be together! Also, he’s like seven or something.

“Say your good-byes, little man,” Tonks tells Rickon, then makes sure Billy Elliot and Tough Sister watch out for Bran, because he’s her special little guy. No offense, Rickon. They leave by the cover of night with Rickon’s puppy Shaggydog, and now the Starks are all spread out, cast into the wind like dandelion fluff. DRINK.

In Yunkai, Dany worries that it’s taking such a long time for Jorah and the rest to get back. Jorah and Grey Worm show up just then, exhausted and covered in blood. “It was just as you said, Khalesi,” Jorah says sexily, because everything he says is breathy and lust-riddled. “The slaves turned against their masters and joined forces with you, Breaker of Chains and Mother of Dragons, Keeper of my Heart. Now how about a congratulatory kis—”

“Yeah, but where is Daario?”

And that’s when Daario swaggers in. “Look at me. Now look at Jorah, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he was twenty years younger, he might smell like me. Look down, now back up, where are you? In a tent with a victory. Here’s a flag to that city you love. Look again, now it’s a THRONE.”

Baby, I got you. If she don't want you, I'll scoop you up like the day's paper.

Paused EXACTLY at the moment where his heart breaks.  Oh, baby, I got you. If she don’t want you, I’ll scoop you up like the day’s paper.

I need to drink. And then invite Iain Glenn to sit next to me so I can soothe him.

Speaking of drinking, that’s what they’re doing at the Twins, celebrating this fine marriage! Lord Bolton arrives, and he reminds us all that he doesn’t drink. Whatever dude, that doesn’t make you better than me.Us. Them. Where were we? I was opening a new bottle of hootch, that’s where.

Interesting tidbit Bolton throws out: he’s married to a Frey (a fat one, so he could get as much dowry as possible). So he has a vested interest/alliance with Frey, it seems, as well as being a bannerman for the Starks. Hmm.

Talisa notices that Cat is stuck with Roose, and she tells Robb to go save her. DRINK. Blackfish gets up to pee. *bites fist* Talisa and Robb make cute faces at each other until Frey shuts the whole party down to make a speech. It’s time for his daughter to get screwed, so everyone send them off to their bed, and undress them along the way! Right, Robb? Robb agrees for the “bedding ceremony,” and yes, it’s a creepy tradition, and I keep flashing back on Sansa and how they didn’t do this, thank goodness.

As Edmure tells the ladies dragging him away that they need to watch out for his trouser snake as it’s more of an anaconda than a garter, Talisa tells Robb she wants to name the baby Eddard Stark. Aww. Guys! Eddard Stark has re-entered the game!

Cat notices that one of the McPoyles gets up and bars the door to the hallway, and the music changes to something mournful. Because I have Closed Captioning on while watching, I see that this song they’re playing is the “Rains of Castamere.” Bronn sang this once, right? And it should have been the Reynes, correct? It’s the song Cersei mentioned to Margaery, about wiping out the entire…

Oh. Oh dear god. Outside, Robb’s Direwolf, who is locked in a stable, starts whining. OH PUPPY NO!! D:

Arya and the Hound ride up to the gate and are told the celebration is over and to leave. While the Hound tries to figure out how to handle this, Arya slips away, excited to get to her mom and brother. NO, ARYA OH MY GOSH.

Frey holds his hand out, stopping the music, and makes his final speech. Cat listens as he talks about how he “owes my daughter” QUEEN, he says QUEEN – a wedding gift,” and she realizes that Roose has armor on under his wedding coat. OH. SHIT. She slaps him across the face—and damn, that made my teeth ring!—and yells for Robb to get out.

That’s when a McPoyle draws a blade and stabs Talisa once, twice, five times in the belly. In the BABY. Oh my dear sweet lord. (And Eddard Stark has left the game, sob!) Robb stares, horror struck, and then it’s on like Red Dawn: the balcony is filled with men carrying crossbows and they unload into Robb. Cat gets an arrow in the back, too. HEY SYMBOLISM IN YOUR FACE, VIEWER. Every man who isn’t Bolton or a Frey gets their throat cut or is shot by arrows.

Arya tries to sneak in, sees some Stark men and lets her shoulders drop in relief. Which is PRECISELY when Frey men come out and kill them, to her horror. WAIT, THERE’S MORE: they then arrow the poor Direwolf to death, and those are endangered species, assholes!! *sobs brokenly*

The Hound catches her trying to get a horse to get the hell out of there, knocks her out, and carries her to safety. Is it because he’s actually nice and cares? Or is it because she can bring him money when he finds the right person who will pay?  ….maybe a little of both, I think.

BUT BACK TO THE RED WINE (BLOOD) FLOWING INSIDE, OH MY GOSH. Cat crawls under tables as Robb crawls to Talisa, who is clearly dead. Everyone living, all Freys at this point, stops to watch and laugh.

Cat sees an opportunity. She grabs a knife from one of the wedding tables and grabs Frey’s young wife, holding the blade to the girl’s neck. Let her son go and the girl lives. By her honor as a Tully and a Stark, she’ll kill the girl, Frey, so do it.  Cat screams, pleads, begs Robb to get out of there, to run, to freaking live. As far as she knows, none of her children are still alive, just Robb. Maybe Sansa.

Frey’s response to having his wife killed in front of him? “I’ll find another.” DAMN. That is COLD.

Roose is there with a blade for Robb’s heart. He leans in and whispers, “The Lannisters send their regards,” as he kills the King of the North.

You mother trucking double crossing...

You mother trucking double crossing…

Cat wails and my heart totally breaks. She blindly slices open the girl’s throat, because on her fucking honor, she is a Tully and a Stark, and she will honor her oath to the end. She continues to stand there, frozen, for all intents and purposes: dead. And a random man appears and slits her throat to make that sure, and the show goes silent.

HOLY. HELL. Guys. Do you think Blackfish made it!? (Don’t spoil me, this is just speculation, because we didn’t SEE him get killed. Or if we did, I didn’t notice.)  What about Edmure?! Are they going to keep him alive until he gets Roslin with child?!

Salt the earth so nothing grows!! (Arya! Brave, strong Arya! And Sansa! And Bran! And Rickon! I don’t want them to be the kings or queens of Westeros, I just want them to live. *cries*)  Danaerys Targaryen, show the Lannisters the meaning of dragonfire, oh my god.

AND LET’S TALK TYWIN! AND ROOSE! So…do you think Roose knew this plan before catching Jaime? Or was this born out of getting Jaime? Or was Jaime a way of Roose showing Tywin that not only can he be trusted, but he can also be an amazing ally? I am tearing my hair out here, because I did NOT see any of this coming, and that is the best kind of tv watching, holy smokes.

One. Freaking. More. Episode. I don’t know if my heart can take it. I PLAN ON HAVING 911 ON SPEED DIAL. Click here for the finale!

Obligatory reminder that I am SPOILER FREE and a NON-BOOK READER.  Please, please, please don’t ruin the viewing pleasure I get from not knowing what to expect.

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  • Katy

    I think that everyone here wants to soothe Jorah. *nods*

    Let me tell you, this is the episode all of us book readers have been waiting for the non-readers to get to this season. (well one of them, there’s one yet to come).

    AND YET I WAS STILL UNPREPARED. *SOBS* There were changes made, but overall I’m very happy with how the whole wedding went down. It’s a HUGE moment in the book when everyone realizes, as you did, that no one is safe.

    We’re all here for you, Laura. *hugs*

    • Jorah can come crawl right into my lap and let me kiss it better. Because I’m a caring person.

      NO MORE, I CAN’T TAKE IT!! I need anything else horrifying to wait until next season – I need that year-long buffer for my heart to heal, omg.

      I THINK I NEED LOTS OF HUGGING TODAY. Wow, well played, Show, well played. Painfully played, horrifically played, but well done. *still crying*

  • Jackie

    A.) I’m a book reader, so I knew from the title of the episode what it was likely to be. I watched anyway, thinking I was prepared….NOPE. They managed to make it EVEN MORE HORRIFYING than it was in the book.
    B.) The bread and salt thing is a hospitality ritual. You eat under my roof, I can’t harm you and you can’t harm me, or we’ll be forever cursed! Except I don’t care about that. THAT just augments the horror of the Red Wedding.
    C.) I laughed out loud at Gilly, only time I laughed this episode. “You know all that just from looking at marks on paper? YOU’RE LIKE A WIZARD.”

    • A) THAT IS WHY I LOVE THIS SHOW. Even book readers get shocked and swept along with the fantastic story telling!

      B) Oh, I get that it’s a hospitality thing, it totally read as that. But salt, symbolically, means two things: I’m wealthy and can share, and DESTROY IT UTTERLY. Love that.

      C) Sweet, sweet Gilly! Bless her. I laughed, too. :D

  • Pingback: so much to catch up on!!! | Mel-O-Drama()

  • Maxwell James

    “Say your goodbyes, little man,”

    The Starks’ house song is “Hello, Goodbye” without the hellos. “Don’t know why you say goodbye I say goodbye” (and yeah, how the show managed to kill poor Ned Stark AGAIN, goddammit. Not to mention Talisa and Robb and poor, poor Cat).

    Oh, Laura – believe me when I say us book readers feel your pain. I went into this episode feeling nothing but sickness & dread, and got plenty of both. And mad props to your husband, btw, who clearly has been aces for not spoiling you for so long.

    I’d say it gets better but – you just can’t say that about this series. It ain’t over, that’s all.

    • Oh my gosh, the Stark’s House song is just a bunch of wailing and flesh ripping. (“It has a nice beat, and I can really dance to it!” claims Tywin Lannister.)

      Ugh, to KNOW that this was coming?! That’s like watching Old Yeller all over again – knowing you have to put a shotgun shell through your beloved. GAH.

      THIS SHOW. It just lifts me up in order to throw me against the pavement. And the crazy thing is…I love it.

    • Maxwell, I was in such a state earlier that I glossed over your hilarious Beatles mention. Now I can only sing: “You say goodbye, and I say goodbye,” in a forcefully cheery voice. AHAHAHA.

      We have to have a dark humor about this, otherwise it would be nothing more than a slow, slow death for us viewers/readers.

      (I’ve also seen allusions to “Hello, Darkness my old friend…” as a Stark song. MAY I ALSO OFFER ‘HURT’ BY NIN? Wait, that’s for me.

      • Maxwell James

        Papa Lannister strikes me as kind of a Burt Bacharach man.

        “Reyne-drops keep falling on my head,
        but that doesn’t mean the Starks won’t soon be turning red…”

        Re: “Hurt,” I could totally see Ned getting down to the Johnny Cash cover of that song.

        • Ned would softly croon “Hurt” (Johnny’s version, for sure, YES!) while picking at a small guitar, sitting on the stone where he showed his son his first beheading for dishonor…

  • Colleen

    ” Danaerys Targaryen, show the Lannisters the meaning of dragonfire, oh my god.” <— This! This is what I want to happen, so badly!!

    So I've read the books, I knew it was coming. I felt physically nauseous through the whole episode and just kept praying "Please, maybe do it next week?" This scene in the books was terrible, on tv… they made it worse! Which is better I guess? Lord help us all. Rob and Talisa being all young, beautiful and in love as they're dying just tore my heart in two.

    As did poor Jorah. What a fantastic job by Iain Glen. And Maisie Williams! She was amazing in this episode. LOVED the Jaqen jokes. I agree with Jackie, the only great laugh was Gilly calling Sam a wizard. Cry all the tears.

    • I don’t know how you book readers do it! I’m almost unwilling to READ THEM NOW. (That’s a lie. A total lie. I will suck those books down like Darjeeling.) That whole moment was as well played out as the quintessential montage of the Five Families being offed in The Godfather. Brilliantly (and painfully) done.

      MAISIE. I love that kid. Oh, her excitement falling into utter despair and terror… ARYA! D:

      *clutches chest*

  • I am just not ok today.

    WTF? I just screamed NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! and seriously cried real tears. Like I was watching my own family get shot down.

    I am grieving today.

    I was pretty clueless…but I kept catching the foreshadowing and then brushing it off…until dude said something about THE RED WINE WILL FLOW. and I was all “Oh. No. He means blood.” But then I wouldn’t let myself believe that because surely they wouldn’t do that to Arya! Surely they wouldn’t do that to Robb and Talisa!? Surely.

    Wow. You’re right. No one is safe. And since I like Tyrion so much, I guess I should just go ahead and start mourning his loss. Because let’s face it, he’s a goner if I like him.

    The only silver lining I can even remotely come up with is that now I don’t have to pick between Daenarys and the Starks on who to root for…. fuck a duck I hate this show! I love this show! I hate this show! I LOVE THIS SHOW.

    • IT WAS LIKE SEEING YOUR OWN FAMILY KILLED, YES! The Starks are the “heart” of the show, our moral compass and our guide through the world to truth and justice.

      AND THAT WAS JUST RIPPED AWAY. I’ve been thinking of how this has been foreshadowed ALL. SEASON. LONG and I’m just dying. So clever. SO CLEVER.

      I can barely think about the people I love in this show, because I’m growing superstitious – if I think it, they’ll kill them. Jorah!? Dany!??!? TYRION!?? OMG, 911, I would like to report a heart attack that is going to happen….

      • am I the only one who prayed to the Lord of Light last night? LOL

  • Mike

    This was the chapter of ASoS where we all threw the book against the wall and refused to keep reading for a week.

    Michelle Fairley knocked it out of the park, last night. The book chapter for the slaughter was from Catelyn’s point of view, so it was nice to see the adaptation center on her observations and reactions as she realized what was happening.

    Also, nice catch on the flayed-man ‘X’ battlefield piece. There have been other, more subtle House Bolton clues earlier in the season to help figure out where Theon is, as well.

    I wish I could tell you the worst is over, but with Martin’s style, there’s really no way to know for sure.

    • “This was the chapter of ASoS where we all threw the book against the wall and refused to keep reading for a week” HAHAHA, I have had that experience to some degree in book reading, but it was NOTHING LIKE THIS. (I’m still scowling at Cold Mountain, let me tell you.)

      Oh, how wonderful that the book read from Catelyn’s POV – that absolutely translated on screen, I think – not having read it, obv – and it made it all the more painful as Robb stands shocked, crying out, “Mother?” AHHHHHH!!! *rips hair, covers self in ashes and sackcloth*

      FLAYED MAN. Oh wow, did I feel like a dope. It’s so clear, but only now. :) Clearly that symbol is what Theon has been strapped to – but I’m looking forward to watching the season over from the beginning to pick up on even more.

      Oh, I do NOT expect that the worst has happened. I fully expect to find a Direwolf sent to me in the mail, me have a year to love it and care for it, and then GRRM himself will show up and kill it in front of me. Hahahaha. *sobs*

    • Maxwell James

      A week? Try a month. Hell, my brother stopped reading for six months, but eventually picked it up again and is chomping at the bit for more.

      Sooner or later we all come back, masochists that we are.

      • It’s just… it hurts so good!

        Emo kids no longer cut to feel, they pick up Game of Thrones.

  • Barbara

    Damn, I mean I was spoiled because I like to be prepared in case these sort of scenes pop up. I WAS NOT PREPARED. I hadn’t even realized that last night was gonna be the Red Wedding ep until someone mentioned it on Facebook. And then because I knew what was coming I was white knuckling it all through the ep. I swear that part when the Rains of Castamere starts playing and Cate realizes that something is very wrong…it chilled me. I was so uncomfortable at that part that I just wanted them to get it over with.

    Ugh. I didn’t even like Robb’s wife all that much but I was literally cringing when that guy started stabbing her. And Robb! When he just gasps out “Mother…” before dying? Jesus, Catelyn look like she was dead the second Robb died. You could just see the life go out of her. When her throat was slit it didn’t even register.

    But can we talk about what a dumb move it was to bring Talisa to the wedding? That was just rubbing salt in Frey’s wounds.

    On a lighter note, I was legitimately cackling when Dany completely overlooked Jorah in favor of Pretty Boy. Like there was some honest ugly laughter going on there on my part. I don’t even dislike the guy, it’s just that it just brings me an endless source of amusement how he’s just forever stuck in the Friend Zone.

    • You were spoiled for this!? ON PURPOSE!? I…it doesn’t compute! ;) But yeah – I don’t think you can prepare for something like that, even knowing it’s going to happen. It was brilliant laid out on my screen.

      I’ve watched the episode three times now, and that moment she hears the song… Yeah. That was a painful, painful moment of realization – it all unravels so slowly, obviously, and horribly, doesn’t it?

      I wasn’t invested in Talisa either, but JEEZ LOUISE DEATH BY WAY OF BABY STABBING?! Frey doesn’t take oath breaking lightly, huh? *gross sobbing*

      I thought the same, re: bringing Talisa in. And they tried to ugly her up, but come on. COME ON.

      Oh, Jorah. He can get in my “let me love you” zone any day of the week. I MEAN, WHAT A LOYAL AND FAITHFUL SERVANT, ahem.

      • Barbara

        I mean when you hear people throw around the term Red Wedding, you know some bad shit is gonna go down. Besides I like to know who’s gonna die. I get overly attached to tv characters, okay? I need to have some warning so I don’t end up blanket wrapped in a corner, heaving with sobs.

        Yeah I saw that giant cloak they threw on her. Like who are you trying to fuck with that, Robb Stark? But honestly I just think asking this guy for help again was an all around bad move. I mean, when Robb initially needed the Frey’s help, wasn’t that based on the fact that he would marry Frey’s daughter. You either marry the daughter and get his help, or you don’t marry her and you also don’t get his help. You can’t have your cake and eat it too. And then you really shouldn’t get that cake and shove it in Frey’s face while asking him for help again! I mean it’s not like Frey seems like a particularly nice guy. It’s Argus Filch for fuck sake!

        Lol Jorah. Forever loyal. Forever alone.

        • I’ve seen the term Red Wedding, but didn’t make the blood association. I thought it meant their clothes, or blah. WOW DID I LEARN.

          You’re absolutely right: Robb should have married the girl, or he should have NOT ASKED FOR HELP IN ADDITION. Let’s not get carried away, though (you’re not – but you know someone out there is): Frey took his grudge A BIT FAR.

          FILCH WOULD HAVE MURDERED POTTER. Since he couldn’t, Frey murdered EVERYONE.

          • Barbara

            Lol, JUST A BIT.

    • cowsharky

      Casting Iain Glen as Jorah is both a good choice and bad choice. Good, because he’s a great actor and has really perfected his role. Bad because thanks to his rugged handsomeness and sex voice it’s impossible to believe that Dany wouldn’t climb that like a pack of Wildlings on the Wall.

      Daario still skeeves me the fuck out.

      • Ahahahaha, :Climb that like a pack of Wildlings on the Wall.” Here, you have won a shiny new Internet. Use it wisely! :D

        There’s something SERIOUSLY untrustworthy about Daario in my mind, too. He’s too smarmy. Never trust a man with that much swagger, unless he’s on a horse with tickets to that thing you love.

  • Sue

    Quick, someone get Hodor a Thundershirt! Oh, God. Thank you, Laura, for making me laugh. Thank you for the “inside men” and the Simpson’s manip and the Michael Scott gif. Because I am DYING inside.

    Why did Filch kill my sweet Catelyn???? WHY??? Why didn’t Robb run? Oh, I know why, I’m just…GAH. And The Hound telling Arya just hours before that the closer they got, the more she feared. WAAAAAAH. And, oh, God, Catelyn’s wail when they killed Robb.

    I don’t have anything smart or even cogent to say. I just want to curl up on the couch with you and have you feed me nachos and tell me that the good guys are always stalwart and true and the bad guys are easily distinguished by their pointy horns or black hats and we always defeat them and save the day. No one ever dies, and everybody lives happily ever after. *sob*

    • I FEEL LIKE WE NEEDED A LAUGH. (OMG, Sally Girl has had her Thundershirt on for days, now. It’s…funky and needs washing. Then I’ll send it north of the Wall for Hodor.)

      WOW, with The Hound giving some foreshadowing of his own, huh? But I guess if there’s anyone that knows how ugly life can be, it’s Sandor Clegane.

      Cate’s wail!! And then she freaking follows through with that throat slit, wow. She is a woman of her word (which was why she was so angry with Robb about Talisa which led to… to… *sobs*)

      I would very much like you to be here braiding my hair. I’ll make you a hard drink, too. :( Then we could get nachos and cry in our ‘ritas.

  • Sally R

    I can’t believe they killed Robb’s wolf. That was the worst moment for me. Although I was glad we didn’t totally have to see it.

    Chris and I were really struck by the silence during the closing credits.

    I don’t have anything else to say because I’m still processing.

    • Sally, I think the killing of the dog was horrible, too. I was whimpering, my fists over my mouth saying, “No, no, no…” and then jumped up and yelled.

      I’m still blown away by it, too. I mean, it’s not television, it’s HB freakingOhmyGOD.

  • Josie Morin

    “Look at me. Now look at Jorah, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he was twenty years younger, he might smell like me. Look down, now back up, where are you? In a tent with a victory. Here’s a flag to that city you love. Look again, now it’s a THRONE.”

    Ah hahahahahaha! I am jealous of your clever funnies :) Poor Jorah, you really could see his poor heart break.

    I’ve been waiting with glee for the Red Wedding, to see everyone freak out, cause I’m a jerk that way. I still wish none of it happened though. Damn you, GRRM. Damn you.

    • OMG, I am ridiculously happy that someone laughed at my Old Spice joke. :D

      OH JORAH. I just want to hug him. Really, really tightly. For a few decades hours.

      Hahaha, you’re not the only one that is enjoying the freak out! Come on, this is a huge, pivotal moment (I assume, given the reactions from book readers) and it has to be hilarious to see us flailing and wailing about.

      (And I wish none of it happened, too. OH MY HEART!!!)

  • whoa, I did not catch the foreshadowing on the placement of the chess pieces, Lannister at the back.

    the Wedding! back at the end of season 1, my brother was super all for the King of the North (he moved on to Stannis in season 2), and I had to keep my mouth shut about what was about to happen. I did manage to keep him from buying a King in the North t-shirt, though.

    Michelle Fairley and Maisie Williams were especially amazing this episode. and now I can’t stop humming “The Rains of Castamere.”

    • I caught that (the game pieces) on my second go ’round. SO. BRILLIANT.

      Ahahaha, good job on helping your brother not make a decision he would have mourned and regretted. Michelle Fairley was OUT.FREAKING.STANDING in this episode, absolutely. Award winning performance, that.

  • Courtney

    One thing I love is how much foreshadowing the show includes, like the books do. I remembering having the same reaction all the show only watchers are having when I read the books- “HOW DID I MISS ALL THE CLUES?!” *tears hair out*

    • The layering in the show is so, so wonderful. I cannot WAIT to watch the whole season over from the beginning to pick up on all of the little hints that were laying there.

      • Yes. THAT. I am already looking forward to watching again. I don’t even watch tv, but this show has me hooked. I had no idea tv could ever be this good.

        I just died watching Arya watch the dire wolf get crossbowed.

  • Gail

    Ohhh this episode. And they made us wait an extra week for it, which while I understand, holiday weekend yes yes yes but STILL, that just feels like it was a purposefully evil decision made by some mustache-twirling sadist executive.

    Talisa, my god. *tears* They made what I knew was going to be horrifying and heartbreaking way way worse than I expected, that was just beyond brutal. Augh.

    The tension and the payoff all through this ep – and this season, you’re so right – was just amazingly done.

    I had other things to say, but I think I’m going to go lie down and hug my pillow or something.


      The Talisa kill was by far the worst. Just caught in a web, that one, and doomed from the moment she looked up and into Robb Stark’s eyes. Poor thing!

      I think we all need to gather in a puppy pile. And then drink. And then sing a HAPPY SONG. *sobs brokenly*

      Oh, this show. Too clever by half, and I love it.

  • Tommy

    Laura, I was wondering what it must feel like to be non-spoiled and see that wedding go down. I was horrified when it happened in the books and seeing it onscreen, even though I thought I was prepared… just, omg, so, so, so horrible. I didn’t think anything would surprise me more than Ned Stark’s death. How wrong I was.

    • Well, I’ll tell you what, Tommy, if you had a camera on me while I was watching, it would have looked like Michael Scott up there, but with arms in the air and tears on my face. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I had to pause it, and it was RIGHT when Talisa was getting stabbed. Then I had to pause it again to catch my breath and it was right when Roose stabbed Robb.


      OH MY GOSH. Just… the surprises this season have been amazing. The man in the box! Beric coming back from the dead! AND OH RIGHT, THE SLAUGHTER OF EVERYTHING GOOD AND MORAL (or attempting to be).

      Man. This show is just astounding. I cannot get enough of it, even though it huuuuuurts.

  • Marquise de Sark

    HOLY…I can’t even…OMG!!
    It’s not often that I’m rendered speechless, but I know I’m watching great TV when it happens. As I also haven’t read the books I had absolutely no freakin idea what was coming. Wow. What next I ask?? (Actually, no book readers should answer that: strictly rhetorical)
    Thanks again for a great recap, (and for making me laugh despite the fact that this was such a harrowing watch: lol “named like George Foreman’s kids”) and for pointing out some of the subtleties and nuances that I missed with a single viewing. :)

    • “I know I’m watching great TV when it happens.” YES. This! When you’re shocked into speechlessness, that’s when you know something extraordinary (painful, amazing, astounding, shocking) has just happened.


      I am so happy to share my flailing with fellow fen! (And super happy that you laughed at the George Foreman joke!) OMG, I can’t imagine going it alone. *clings to you all*

  • Gjulleen

    I was unspoiled, I kept thinking Arya was going to somehow, magically, save them all.

    This is a random musing, but how do you think Littlefinger will react to the death of Cat?

    • I KEPT THINKING ARYA WAS GOING TO GET THERE, TOOOOOOOO! OMG, can you imagine if she’d been found? I would be catatonic right now, NGL. I– No. NO THAT CANNOT HAPPEN.

      And ooooh, what a great question! I think that it’s going to spur Littlefinger to even greater heights of bastardy, because there’s nothing for him to love now (or imagine he loves). I think he’s going to be livid, and then I believe he’ll try and seek revenge on Bolton and Frey, which would be amazing to see.

  • Aaron L

    Laura, Laura, Laura!! This is exactly why i am so happy you and all the nonreaders that didnt get spoiled, didnt get spoiled. Your recap and reactions explain it all. I read this book just over ten years ago, and last night it was like it was just yesterday. those scabs were ripped away and freshly remade. the Talisa stabbing was the first yank on that scab then the blood just kept pooring out. I too threw my book against the wall after reading this chapter Yelling I AM SO FUCKING DONE !!!!THIS IS BULL SHIT!!!! The book just lay there, taunting me. I had to go back tho. I couldnt end there ;)

    You could just FEEL Catelyns pain seeing her first born killed right before her. Michelle should win an emmy just for that performance alone. Her scream sent shivers……

    thats all i can think to say right now.. need to get my air back after having it knocked out of me ;) i cqn only imagine what the people who didnt know it was coming feel.

    • What I love about the fannish community we’ve built over here (House Stone!) is how respectful of the viewing experience you book readers are. I really can’t thank y’all enough for it. You remember what it was like to read it, how gutted you were, and you knew that I, too, would want to feel like my chest had been carved open with a rusty knife. And how much do I love to know that for book readers, this was an experience all on its own, too?

      AHAHAHA, the throwing the book against the wall – I have to say, as an aspiring book writer myself, there can be no greater compliment than to have a reader that freaking invested. DAMN. That is so awesome (and do you know how hard it makes it for me to not pick up these books? I AM A READER!! *cries*)

      Michelle should DEFINITELY win an Emmy for that. Hell, throw a Tony in there, too. A FULL EGOT.

      I’m still blown away, thirty-six hours later. (Hell, it’s been ten years for you book readers!)

  • Aaron L

    A friend of mine tld me after he read this chapter he knew exactly how Anne Wilkes felt in Misery. He wanted to kidnap GRRM like anne did Paul Sheldon and do a little hobbling himself. Then make him rewrite it :)

    • “YOU DIRTIE BIRDIE!!!! SLIPPED AWAY?! SHE SLIPPED AWAY?!?!?” [ankle smash]

      The most honest depiction of an uber-fan ever in the history of things, that Annie Wilkes was. *shoves a huge Royal at GRRM*

  • Mike

    About the best side-effect of this massacre has been that, since you now know that Martin can and has killed with no warning, mercy or fairness, you will spend the ENTIRE rest of the books/show knowing that ANY character can/might be cut down where they stand at just about ANY time.

    It’s a big enough change to the way you read/watch, that it’s easy to believe that it was a purposeful act on Martin’s part.

    • Yes. YES MIKE. Yes. I am no longer safe. I am that child that witnessed the soldiers come into my home, hand me a piece of chocolate, and then pointed to where my mother was sleeping. DO I EVEN NEED TO FINISH THIS? Nothing is sacred, no one is safe. Especially not the reader.

      I have never had a reading/viewing experience like that, before. Honestly, I think that element is what makes people so fanatical about the series, and with good reason! “WE’RE ALL DOOMED! LIVE PASSIONATELY WHILE YOU CAN!” Freaking love this.

  • Glen L

    Thank you for writing the only recap worth reading every week. I’ve been coming here for them since last season without posting and feel it’s way past time I show my appreciation.
    Experiencing each episode with you really takes me back to when I first read the books and how I felt during that. And you’re doing it while also making me laugh!
    Like other book readers I was of course eagerly awaiting (with glee and dread) the reactions of everyone experiencing the red wedding for the first time.
    When I first read that scene, while I didn’t throw my book across the room like many others, I did have to stop and wait for the tears to stop before continuing. And while I’ve retread the series several times now I’ve always skipped this chapter as it’s just too painful. The impact of seeing that on the show was in no way reduced by knowing it was coming so all the props to everyone involved there.
    I seem to have gone rambling on for quite a bit considering I was gonna just gonna write a short post showing my appreciation of your writeups so once again thank you very much and keep doing what you’re doing.

    • Aww, thank you, Glen! That’s so awesome to hear, that you’ve been enjoying these and flashing back to your own reading experience.

      Oh, I totally get why you readers were so anticipatory: this was an actual bloodbath of epic proportions, not to mention utterly heartbreaking. How would this play out on the screen? Would our hearts be crushed completely like it was when you read it? That’s AMAZING to hear that you would skip this on a re-read. I’m trying to think of any series where I’ve had that visceral of a reaction, and I’m coming up with bupkis. (Do you know how hard it is for me to not read these things?!? GAH. But no, I made a promise.)

      This is a place of rambling! Chat! Strike up conversations! This is a safe place where you don’t have to worry about people getting pretentious with you, or rude, etc. (I monitor the comments pretty fiercely – it’s a place for fans to be fans, period.) I love when people chatter. And again, thank you so very much for coming back each week! That means a lot to me. <3

      • Glen L

        I am thoroughly impressed and thankful that you haven’t gone and read the books yet. I have no self control in that regard. For the last book I preordered the hardcover and when it didn’t arrive on the release day I had to buy the ebook as well as I could not wait that one more day.
        But enough about the books as this is supposed to be about the show.

        While the final scene deservedly gets all the attention I’m just constantly amazed at how well every aspect of the show is made. This episode I especially loved that we got to see how similar Arya and the Hound are despite being such opposites to one another. They both have been put through incredible pain that has made them so hard and savage to their enemies, while looking for a place where they belong.

        • If I can explain how crazy it is that I’ve not succumbed to the power of these books, I have all 5 on my shelf RIGHT WHERE I WRITE, and the first two are on my Kindle. I’m a masochist at heart.

          Oooh, lovely point about Arya and the Hound: both the younger sibling, both experienced pain and loss early on, but there’s something inherent in Arya that makes her a bit more noble. Then again, if she’s lucky to live as long as Sandor has, she might lose some of her hopefulness. (Not that she’s a beacon of positivity, or anything, but she is Ned’s child: she believe right will always win out.)

          I can honestly say that there’s not a character that I don’t care about. There are degrees of difference, of course, like Stannis just hasn’t merited any real passion as a show-watcher, but I have hope that will change. The show hasn’t let me down yet.

  • Scott

    Great recap, as usual.
    I am yet another book reader who literally threw the book to the side after this…and then, the next chapter is an Arya POV and the way it ends (with the Hound catching her from behind and knocking her out with the dull end of his axe), it makes it appear that SHE is dead as well. I NEVER flip ahead in books, but I IMMEDIATELY started frantically searching ahead to make sure there was another Arya POV chapter to come. Jesus….that would have been IT for me. (Bullshit…there is no way I would have stopped reading).

    My wife hasn’t read the books, and I ALMOST made it through last night without losing it…until I looked over at her and the tears were just streaming down her face….God, I’m about to cry at work just thinking about it…

    Fuck the Lannisters. Fuck the Boltons. Fuck the Freys. No death is horrible enough.

    • Scott

      By the way…that Arya tidbit is not a spoiler, I swear…it’s the same scene we saw last night with the Hound knocking her out and carrying her away in all of the confusion.

      • Thank you, Scott!

        Oh, you know I didn’t even think to take the Arya getting knocked out was her being dead/killed by The Hound (and yes, I knew you weren’t spoiling me! <3) . But yeah, if that had happened? I would have struggled to make it to Ep 10, not even going to lie. I love that kid so much. That would have been just torture porn, you know? I'm okay with dark stories, I'm okay with things not working out in the end (I love Chinese cinema, and OH do they love good people dying), but killing for the sake of being shocking isn't anything interesting to me.

        This wasn't that in the slightest. This is how life is - good people die, people are betrayed, and people seek revenge. I wouldn't believe the Hound would kill Arya just to do it.

        Can I say what a great husband you are? For both not spoiling her, and then being touched by how moved she was. Aww, you're awesome.

        AND YEAH: FUCK THE FREYS, BOLTONS, AND LANNISTERS. I want the show to end with Joffrey's head on a spit. (As in the whole show, not next week! I love to hate Weaselteat!) Tywin Lannister is currently one bad ass mofo. Oh, I hope he and Danaerys meet.

  • Thanners

    Finally got around to reading your recap. It’s the one I enjoy reading the most, and so I save it til last, since it’s just the right balance of summary, wit, and reaction thoughts.

    As with most other readers, I’d also been awaiting other peoples’ reactions to this episode. I actually feel like a terrible person savouring the schadenfreudeliciousness of it. But I don’t think it was a petty, malicious glee at watching other people receive the same emotional punch in the guts. Actually, it was kind of painful all over again, and really I feel like I should thank you for sharing your feelings.

    It’s just that it was a horrible, but also really special moment in the books, and watching/reading about other people go through that moment for the first time brings us back some semblance of that first-time read again. I also look forward to those other rare moments where I get to vicariously experience with you the punch-the-air-coz-this-is-awesome moments.

    Did you find all these things foreshadowy as you were going, or only in retrospect?

    Hmm. I remember when I’d first read these sections, we’d already been introduced to the hospitality tradition, and I remember thinking how Walder Frey was going to try to avoid providing them their symbolic bread and salt, and so most of my anxiety was early on, thinking he’d betray them before the custom was completed. Then they asked for bread and salt, and Walder Frey granted it, and I suddenly felt relieved. I thought “oh, well thank goodness for that, they’re safe now.”

    And then I remember reading later on, during the actual slaughter, a part of my mind kept thinking “Wait! How’s Robb going to get out of this? This is a horrific betrayal, but how’s he going to recover after being shot up so bad?” It still took me almost until the end of the chapter to realise that there wasn’t going to be a narrow-escape-with-grievious-casualties, after all.

    • Aww, you guys are making me blush with the love! (That in no way means I want it to stop. Hahahaha.) And you’ve given me a new favorite word: schadenfreudeliciousness.

      YES. That’s exactly it, but the thing is, I TOTALLY GET IT. I get why you guys are wanting to see our reaction! I mean, it was huge when you read it. And you were all alone, sitting in your chair (or wherever) when this…assault happened. To Catelyn, to Robb, to the remaining Stark bannermen, and to YOU. Now you have the chance to share that pain, to see if other people are as affected as you were.

      As for the foreshadowing, moments like the very beginning, where Robb and Cat both said quite solemnly, “If Walder Frey cooperates,” perked my ears up. Other than that, it was all upon reflection and re-watching. I genuinely was so excited about just getting more story that I wasn’t paying attention to the title and what that could mean – I certainly didn’t think the Starks would be “wiped out” since they’re main characters. But oh, how I’ve learned. NO ONE IS SAFE.

      And how interesting that the bread and salt custom is something formally addressed in the book series! I just assumed it was ye olde tradition from Middle Eastern times, translated into this fantasy world.

      I just might have to add a tagline to the end of all GoT recaps: NO ONE IS SAFE. No one. Nope, not even them. D:

  • Dan Caedes

    I’m joining the rest of the long time readers, first time posters here. First, a big, huge THANK YOU for the more than great reviews. Your enthusiasm, humor and eloquence are simply marvelous to read. Yours is the review I wait for most eagerly, and week and week again you prove me why.

    First time poster, I said, and that is the power of the Red Wedding. But the greatest thing about it is that, if you analyze the events up to this point, IT MAKES PERFECT SENSE. It’s even forseeable, if we were heartless traitorous bastards and could think like one. Tywin Lannister had a plan, and he’s no Cylon to forget about it!

    We had a party yesterday to see the episode at my place. 4 non-readers, who came in all weeks, and 5 bookreaders who take the chance to see their reaction. O didn’t said why, but it was mandatory to bring some red clothing to the party. :-) It was really, really great.

    I would like to praise all the team and crew, but one actor in particular: David Filch Bradley. His Walder Frey is absolutely sublime. That image with him drinking from the goblet while the Starks are butchered… Very Palpatine indeed. To think this man has got…. what? 20 minutes of total screen time in three seasons? and right now is one of the most hated characters on the show, rivaling King Weaselteat himself!! What a cast this show has.

    Only one episode left. Why? Whyyyy?

    • I feel like an NPR call in show! :D So, so happy to have you come out of the shadows, and unbelievably glad to know you enjoy my fannish flailing, ha.

      As of this comment, it is Wednesday afternoon, and I am STILL SHAKING AND SAD about the Red Wedding. I can’t imagine what it’s been like for book readers. And this was ten years ago when it was published? Good lord. I think we all need to make a prayer circle and pass the hootch and show on the doll where the bad man hurt us.

      I absolutely agree that this move of Frey’s makes sense. Well, for him. And ESPECIALLY for Tywin. He has just assured that Sansa is the heir to the North, and now Tyrion is, or rather: House Lannister. Oh, that clever, clever devil. If this was a RISK game board, Tywin basically took over Africa (the key to winning that game).

      I love that you made your guests wear something red! BRILLIANT. And as for David Bradley…is it really only 20 minutes of screentime? I just gasped at that. It definitely feels like more because he put so much into his character. He’s not evil for the sake of it, he’s not cruel for the sake of it. He has a methodology to everything, a justification for his actions, and that llittle “Hey, lookee there!” smirk he gives Robb as his beautiful daughter is revealed? The guy has a sense of humor. Oh, what a bastard (and what a delight to watch weekly).

      I DO NOT KNOW HOW WE ARE GOING TO DEAL WITH THIS LAST EPISODE, I JUST DO NOT. I am going to need everyone to bring a bit of poetry about their feelings; I’ll provide the punch (spiked) and pie, naturally. AND HUGS. I have a feeling we’re still going to need them…

  • Aaron L

    LMAO!! The old Royal treatment across the face. Thatll learn ya George ;)

    You know I was thinking. (someone might have already mentioned this, not sure) The title of this Ep is The Rains of Castamere, and everyone knows that that’s a Lannister song, yet there isn’t one Lannister in this episode. HMMMM….. Ohhhh, but their presence is SURELY felt.

    • Absolutely. Tywin Lannister is lording over this episode without question. I went back to S1’s Baelor (which is when we first meet Frey) and WOW is the foreshadowing all over it. The Lannisters are camped on the other side, Robb needs to get across, the deal is made (and it includes Arya! I’d forgotten that bit) and Frey is angry that he’s constantly overlooked until someone needs something of him.

      Well. I’m not saying he planned it that far out with Tywin, but the seeds were planted for sure. Tywin is definitely the type that knows just when to jerk the strings. (And when news travels to King’s Landing, I wonder how Margaery will take this news?)

  • Maxwell James

    Since you’re talking foreshadowing – I keep going back to Varys’ “wizard in a box” scene from earlier this season, and the lesson of how revenge takes patience. Just thinking about it gives me chills.

    • What an excellent point! I’m spending part of Saturday and Sunday watching the whole series from the beginning, picking up on details that I couldn’t have known were important until after the fact. I expect there to be a lot of pointing and shouting at my end.

      People who diss this show aren’t paying attention.

  • hpchick

    (M-O-O-N, that spells Hodor!)
    Love you for the shout-out to The Stand.

    • Love YOU for getting it!! <3

      • hpchick

        Tom Cullen RULES!
        I want Stephen King to stop writing a book a year & take time to write another rambling story that seems like it will go on forever & the readers get completely sucked into the world he created where they love & hate & are annoyed and pissed off by some characters but always feel the loss when they are killed & so excited when they triumph (& get killed later). It’s been forever since he wrote anything quotable IMO.

        Well, that was a tangent. Kinda had that in me for a while & none of my friends are SK fans.

        Love your reviews & I feel the same way. I want to read the books & I may start the first 2. Daario is pretty, but I want Jorah. I love BAMF Arya & her watchdog Hound (I sooo wanted him dead in the 1st season). The Red Wedding made me want to drink heavily but I re-watched it anyway….twice. Joffrey wasn’t in this episode, but I enjoy seeing him get slapped & have never wanted to see a child tortured in my life until that little SH%$. Nope. I don’t feel bad about it.

        • I totally agree re: Stephen King. The last things he wrote that gripped me by the short hairs was the Dark Tower series. I loooooooved it. I remember when he had his horrible accident and no on eknew if we would live, then if he would write again. AND THERE WERE STILL TWO BOOKS LEFT IN THE DARK TOWER SERIES. <-- made me feel a little Annie Wilkes, not gonna lie. ;) Yes, Daario is pretty, but JORAH. We know him, we know he's trustworthy, and he's a long haul kind of guy, happy to be by her side and support her. Daario? Hmm. I don't trust him yet. I'm holding out on the books, because I made a promise, but I REALLY WANT TO READ THEM. Here's to hoping you can hold off after #2! :D

  • Oh wow. Just wow.

    Thanks for making it all a little bit lighter. THIS is my safe place.

    • *hugs* Oh, this episode ached like just about nothing else, right? :(

      I’m so happy to have eased some of that ache.