Previously on Sleepy Hollow: Ichabod Crane and Abbie Mills jumped into mystery-solving together — despite Ichabod just waking up after observing his Sestercentennial in a bewitched cave-grave without a single pee-break, and Abbie witnessing the terrible loss of her mentor and father-figure to the Headless Horseman. Andy Dunn got all rubberneck-y after consorting with demons, and Katrina Crane spoke from her spooky netherworld with apocalypse-helpful hints. Then Katrina and Ichabod found out they are destined to be supernatural crime-fighting BFFs! Are you on board yet? ARE YOU?
Run, Ichabod, run from the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse! Ichabod is soon caught Tim Burton-style in snaking branches that snag his feet and suck him from the foggy forest into a spooky tunnel. His caught-between-worlds wife Katrina tells him frantically, “The first dark spirit rises with the blood moon. She’s one of us; you must stop her before she kills again.”
At the station, Abbie contends with a skeptical Frank Irving, who scoffs about “Mr. Crane, our resident time traveler?” and shows her surveillance footage seeming to prove Andy Dunn broke his own fool neck (instead of a demon doing it for him). Because the other officers who saw the Headless Horseman recanted (jerkwads), Abbie and Ichabod look crazier than ever with their claims of supernatural brouhaha. Irving can’t go to August Corbin’s funeral but emphasizes, “Do not embarrass me,” because Abbie needs more pressure and shaming when she’s mourning her dead mentor, am I right?
Meanwhile, Ichabod wakes in a motel room Abbie’s marked up with helpful post-its explaining How to Coffee and How Not to Fail Showering (and yay to Ichabod getting the first gratuitous near-nudity shot of the series rather than Abbie being randomly in a bra and panties).
Abbie shows with scrumptious donut holes. Cripes, this show will not be good for my snack-avoidance efforts. But even delicious glazed treats can’t sweeten their conflict when Abbie turns cynical at the tale of Ichabod’s vision.
The look on his face when he thinks she doesn’t believe him! *clutches heart* “Belief is sanity,” he emphasizes when she mutters she’s had enough of people thinking she’s crazy for a lifetime. *wrings hands* I have all these feelings about Abbie’s suffering her entire life from people not believing her.
At the coroner’s office, zombie John Cho Andy Dunn flings himself from his body bag and re-snaps his head back on straight.
There’s no time to fret about his pesky lingering neck-folds, though, not when the demon shows up and rails at him in Greek. Andy coughs what’s got to be a cursed medallion right out of his devil-stretched throat. “Release who?” he asks the demon. The first dark spirit, Andy; keep up!
It’s a weird kind of marriage when you don’t cotton on to the fact that your wife is the leader of a super powerful coven, is all Abbie wants to say about the whole Katrina thing. Ichabod takes out his crankiness at that observation by complaining about the “ten percent levy on baked goods…how is the public not flocking to the streets in outrage?” Never mind his newfound doughnut hole anger; Abbie’s taking him to Corbin’s funeral so he better fly right for like five minutes.
Oh my god, the funeral. Watching Abbie stand at respectful attention while tears fell from her eyes?
Gah, I only got one episode, barely two scenes of Abbie and August Corbin, and I freaking believe their bond so hard that I made weird gaspy choking noises while Abbie stood there looking so lost and alone. I barely noticed Ichabod re-visiting his wife’s grave and figuring out the “one of us” part of his vision meant the dark spirit to rise will be a witch.
Andy Dunn hauls his demon medallion over to a monument so he can admire it starting to smoke and then spontaneously setting itself on fire. A figure uncurls and rises bearing the medallion around her neck; it’s the witch Katrina warned Ichabod about, who seems to be sans skin and goopy. “The ashes of the pious will ordain your resurrection,” Andy tells her. “Take their flesh, and you will reclaim yours.” Andy, just when I think you can’t get any worse!
Next Andy pulls over a guy who wants to know what the hell happened to his neck. “It’s hard to explain,” Andy sniffs, because RUDE. By the way, what’s your full name, person about to be a witch dinner? Jeremy Stephen Furth? “I just want you to know it wasn’t personal,” Andy tells him before leaving the witch to jump on the hood of the car, crack the windshield with her hand, and set EVERYTHING ON FIRE. Aww, Officer Andy is one of those sensitive guys who needs you understand it’s not his fault you’re burning to a cinder.
Ichabod and Abbie bicker over her doubt and their literal witch hunt until he pulls her up short saying, “You’ve not had appropriate time to mourn your sheriff.” Okay, YES, it’s not only the loss of Corbin, but the loss of someone who believed utterly that Abbie wasn’t crazy because she said she saw a demon as a young girl. I’m so glad we’re actually going to explore the freaking repercussions that encounter had on Abbie.
“It got pretty bad for a while,” Abbie says slowly, explaining the aftermath of the sighting. While her sister Jenny went to an institution, Abbie turned to drugs, bad relationships, and other “stupid things to try and shut it all out.” Jeezum crow, this, this traumatized reaction to a supernatural experience, a thousand times yes! Abbie’s entire life has been shaped by not just her encounter, but by the evil that’s in Sleepy Hollow, and that is terrible and tragic and true.
Instead of arresting her when she and a boyfriend broke into a pharmacy, the sheriff brought her to a diner. “You know what I love about apple pie a la mode,” he muses as he sits across from her. EVERYTHING? It’s that the ice cream immediately begins to melt, and in five minutes turns into a soupy mess. “When that happens, we’re leaving,” he says briskly. “So you’ve got five minutes to decide if you’re going to change your life, or I take you to jail.” Oh. *clutches heart* Also. DID HE NOT ORDER PIE FOR HER? D:
Faced with Corbin’s challenge, Abbie decided to change. “I got more fathering in those five minutes than I got my whole life,” Abbie says tremulously, and good god, but Nicole Beharie is marvelous and heart-breaking in this scene! The moment is lost when they get a call about unusual activity on the police radio, and the two of them head to the scene of Jeremy Furth’s murder. He’s been burned alive with “claw marks” as though someone dug into his chest.
The sight strikes a chord in Ichabod, who tells the story of a horrible destruction he encountered on a blood moon during the war. They found dead soldiers reduced to ash and a dark presence in the woods.
When similar strange murders became more frequent, “tales of a dark coven” and their high priestess, Serilda of Abbadon circulated. Wait, Abbie totally knows this one, from Corbin’s story of two groups of witches in Sleepy Hollow!
Back at the station, Corbin’s secret files are missing, nerts! While Ichabod awaits Abbie, a stupidly handsome detective comes over to mock him for teaching a course at Oxford about “how we kicked your ass.” “I didn’t realize you were there,” Ichabod sniffs, because RUDE. Stupid handsome detective was in Iraq, he says in chip-on-his-shoulder fashion; what war did Ichabod serve in? “One I pray is never doomed to repeat itself, sir.” Don’t even try to trump Ichabod in any conversation involving war, because he fought for the fate of humankind, yo.
“We’re on the clock; let’s go,” Abbie breaks up the conversation, only to have Ichabod pry about Luke being her ex (because let’s face it, after 250 years, he is starved for gossip). Were they betrothed? “There was no betrothing,” she snaps, adding, “I will happily pay you to stop talking,” when he comments they could get back together (they broke up because of Abbie’s now-discarded plans to move away).
Ichabod decides to distract Abbie from being annoyed at him poking at her private business by hacking into a wall with a fire axe and showing her a secret tunnel passage. Seriously. It’s part of a series of subterranean tunnels built during the war. “Shall we?” he says, holding a lantern he’s lit to give the scene a little of that ye olden days flavor.
You know what you find in war tunnels? Crates of gunpowder, and witches’ bones! Well, at least we addressed the whole “witches were undeserving of a proper burial” thing; Katrina only had a headstone because it was a ruse to hide the Head of the Horseman. *pauses* Seems an obvious sort of trick now that we’ve got confirmation that EVERYONE would have found a witch’s tombstone super suspicious.
They swing open a wide metal grating and walk into an awesome lair. Why on earth would anyone use this funky windowed area for putting dusty furniture and files? I guess to give Abbie and Ichabod a super cool hangout. They find Corbin’s files and immediately begin searching for information.
Two freakishly blond children kick around a soccer ball until Officer Andy Dunn shows up to ask one’s name in his ominous loose-necked manner. “Kyle,” the boy says shyly. “Kyle what? I need to hear it.” “Nice name,” he says flatly when he hears the boy is Kyle Hemmington. “Sorry it had to be yours.” Great, now I feel bad for calling the kid freakish for his blond hair when he’s so obviously about to be burned alive by Skinless Witch.
Turns out Serilda’s title reveals her connection to the Romani Greek. You know, if I could come across a witchcraft plot on television that didn’t involve gypsies even once, I would bake the network execs involved biscotti. Just once! Ichabod recognizes the language because he’s got an eidetic memory. Of course he does.
Their research tells them the Sisterhood of the Radiant Heart used white magic to make Serilda vulnerable to mortal attack. Flashback to Serilda in colonial times ready to be burned alive: “By the turn of the blood moon,” she vows before the fire is lit, “the ashes of your ancestry will be mine! Your flesh will be my flesh; I will live again!”
Okay, so it turns out the magistrate who read Serilda’s sentence was Robert Daniel Furth. His son’s descendants include Jeremy Furth, and his daughters, the Hemmingtons. I have to say this for Serilda: she was so organized. If people were about to burn me at the stake, I would not have been together enough to take note of the magistrate’s name, never mind who the hell his kids married, even if I kept trying to remind myself that I wanted to exact gruesome supernatural revenge sometime in the future!
Over at Chez Hemmington, the doomed blond boy gets up calling for his mother (crap, they mentioned his dad was already dead; is he going to find his mom in an ashy pile?). Spotting the front door wide open, he closes it, but the witch is already behind him in the hallway! When the child yells, his mother runs downstairs just as Abbie and Ichabod arrive.
Kyle tells his mother he saw a woman who “looked like she was on fire!” You know, she kind of looks like she has lava crawling under her super dry skin; good point, Kyle! Whoops, hey, Ichabod interrupts awkwardly: are you now missing a funerary urn with your dead husband’s ashes in it? Turns out Kyle’s dad was the last Hemmington because Kyle was adopted.
Abbie and Ichabod hightail it out of there to grab Serilda before she can complete her resurrection and try to burn her alive. I just want to know how the ashes of Kyle’s dead dad said his full name for John Cho Andy Dunn. Because that seemed like a thing. Ahahaha to Abbie “jolly good!”-ing Ichabod about their plans to burn Serilda alive again. “That is not an accurate impersonation,” he says in a wounded manner while explaining they’re tunnel-bound (remember, war tunnels = witches’ bones + gunpowder).
John Cho Andy Dunn finds time amid helping a witch wear the dust of the pious or whatever to sass off. “I don’t need any help, as long as you’re comfortable,” he complains while he’s digging for her bones. “Just aim and pull the trigger,” Abbie advises Ichabod in another part of the tunnels as they split up to find the witch. Oh, he knows how to use firearms, thanksverymuch!
While Abbie and Ichabod search, Serilda chants in Greek and pouring ashes over her skeleton. AS ONE DOES. She lays herself down atop the bones, melding them into her body. Ichabod runs over in time to see her jerking back to life. When she catches the bullet he fires, he grabs a torch and skedaddles. “It was empty,” he tells Abbie with dignity when she asks why the hell he only fired once. Uh, guess who doesn’t know how to use modern firearms, thankyouverymuch?
“You carry her stench in your heart,” Serilda scornfully tells Ichabod about Katrina. “She’s held captive between worlds; her fate is sealed, and now so is yours.” “Brace yourself,” Ichabod yells to Abbie, throwing a torch to the crates of gunpowder. The torch fizzles, but a spark finally catches fire. Abbie and Ichabod huddle behind stone enforcements as a massive fireball shoots through the tunnel.
Um, goodbye, Officer Andy? Or dot dot dot? Dude did survive a snapped neck, after all.
If Katrina’s imprisoned, perhaps she can be freed, Ichabod says excitedly back at the station. “I am so far down the rabbit hole,” Abbie tells him; she wants things to go back to the way they were. “I’m afraid neither of us can,” he says, and you know what, these two actors are awesome, because I completely buy their respect for one another (I love that Ichabod calls Abbie lieutenant, repeatedly affirming his esteem for her rank), as well as their developing friendship. They can find some comfort, however, “knowing this strange road we find ourselves on can only be traveled together.”
Ichabod heads off in search of coffee. Don’t anyone actually let him near the coffee maker! Abbie moves toward Corbin’s office, where she finds him at his desk. “You look lost, kid,” he says kindly, and BAM, RIGHT IN MY HEART! “Look, if you’re going to haunt me, be helpful, okay?” she says, and please please please keep Clancy Brown around for more of these between-worlds meetings! He’s such a fabulous father figure; his gentle point that he didn’t confide his findings in her because she’d spent a lot of time running away just about killed me.
“Ever since you were little you let your life be ruled by fear,” he tells her; it’s said with such concern and affection that we understand he only wants for her to recognize her strength and move forward. Beharie is perfection here, broken and vulnerable, at yet another turning point with her mentor. What should she do? The only person who can tell that is her, he says, adding “That’s what faith is, honey.” *bursts into tears* “I really miss you,” she says tearfully. “Don’t be afraid of number 49,” he tells her. “That’s when you find out you’re not alone.”
The camera moves down an institutional corridor, stopping at Room 49. “Tonight, Mills,” a nurse tells Abbie’s sister Jennie, who is like a warrior with her pushups and readiness and general awesomeness! “Seen any more monsters lately, Jenny?” Gee, I thought nurses weren’t supposed to taunt people. Must have missed that bit in the Nurse’s Oath.
Though Jenny takes the pill she’s handed, when the nurse leaves she not only spits it out on the floor, but crushes it beneath her foot before blowing the dust away. BADASSERY! She glances at the old article clipped to the wall, about her and Abbie and their claims about the forest, before starting to do pull-ups using an iron bar. There’s a flash of a demon in the room with her, but when she turns, there’s nothing there.
This show, you guys. This show! It makes me want doughnut holes and apple pie a la mode — except the doughnut holes would be stale with the knowledge that someone who believed in me is gone forever, and the apple pie a la mode would make me weep into my melted ice cream for my lost innocence. AND YET I WOULD STILL WANT THEM! See you next week!