Walking Dead 4.15 – Us

AND BRING CONDOMS :D /sexy bass line

AND BRING CONDOMS :D /sexy bass line

Previously! In this penultimate episode, we had theories on dinosaurs, sad and lonely Tom cats, reunions, and no sign of Beth…OR WAS THERE? Also, you didn’t think I would go into this recap without telling you how to make a penny battery, did you? Oh, have I got protips for you. AND THEORIES. Let’s dive in.

 

We bounce round between stories of some of our groups, starting with Nobel Hair Prize wikipedia-ing Tara to death about theories on what wiped out the dinosaurs. AND WHAT IF IT WAS A ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE? That’s the coolest idea ever. But Dr. Camaro Cut doesn’t actually think that’s what happened. Tara: I don’t caaaaaaaaaaaare. They spy a smashed penny on the tracks, leading Nobel Hair Prize to get “excited” about the possibility of making a battery.

Protip: Make a Penny Battery! Supplies needed: odd number of US pennies, from 1982 to now. (This is due to the metal composition.) Scrape off the copper on the HEADS side of all but one of your coins to expose the Zinc – it’s gotta be on top. The one you didn’t scrape is the topmost penny. Or alternate between pennies and dimes, no scraping! You need electrolytes (salt water, Gatorade or vinegar and water) and cardboard cut to mimic the same shape of the pennies – soak them in the salt water, and stack them up penny-cardboard-penny with the unscratched penny on top. Put your wire leads top and bottom, hook them up to your little LED light (they use less volts) and you’ve got a little night light.

If the cardboard hangs over and touches another penny, it’ll short it out. You can add more pennies/wet cardboard to the stack to get a higher volt. 5 – 7  pennies = .8 Volts. A 5-cell [5-penny] battery lasts for like, six hours – plenty to get you through, say, a dark train tunnel. This is a wet cell, so like that car battery Daryl fixed that I told you about, you gotta keep that cardboard moist with salt water for this to work.

Want to kick this into high gear? Get a plastic canister, like the kind film used to come in. Poke a hole small enough in the top and bottom to feed the wire lead into. Tape over the hole once you’ve done that to keep it sealed, fix a small LED light to the wires, and you’ve got a hand held flashlight. BOOM. Who’s got two thumbs and should be on your apocalypse team? THIS GAL.

Also, I won’t bore you to death like some people. (So, we all agree Eugene is most likely on the Spectrum, right? I say this as a mother of an autistic child and sister to a woman so deeply autistic that she’s non-verbal due to overwhelming stimulus, so don’t go writing me letters.) “Dr.” Eugene continues to have total recall to other Wiki pages about things (I don’t think he’s a doctor, I think he’s a basement dweller who has a photographic memory of Reddit pages, etc.) and I cannot understand why Abraham is so enamored with this guy. Like, it’s not translating from the screen. Just me?

Dr. Reddit keeps running his mouth day after day until Tara spies a Terminus sign meant for Glenn. Aww! Glenn’s overcome and takes off running, singing Whitney Houston’s “I Will Always Love You.” …maybe wait for the rest of them? No? Carry on.

LITERALLY WITH A BACKPACK FULL OF MAGNUMS I'M COMING BB (and soon you will be, too HEY-O)

LITERALLY WITH A BACKPACK FULL OF MAGNUMS I’M COMING BB (and soon you will be, too, HEY-O)

Rick, Michonne, and Carl’s Group

They’re moving slowly to Terminus, and maybe things would speed up if Michonne and Carl would stop walking a tightrope on the train tracks? They’re playing a game, Michonne acts like she’s never been around a child older than three (probably hasn’t – sorry, this is a thing I have when people don’t know how to be age-appropriate with kids of various ages, ignore me) and loses a bet, having to give over her favorite chocolate bar to Carl. GOD DAMMIT, CARL.

Oh, he shares it with her, that’s nice! Rick beams on his found family, Carl drops the candy wrapper to the ground because he wants to make the world a yucky mess. (I know, it can’t get any worse.) And this is the last time we see Rick – oh, we’re gonna hear about him, though.

WHICH LEADS TO DARYL AND HIS GROUP OF HOODLUMS.

They’re woken up from a nap in the middle of the gee dee woods by a Walker snagging his face on some barbed wire, but don’t see Daryl. HE LEFT! Wait, no, his gear is still there. He’s just out in the woods stalking a rabbit. As he fires, another arrow whizzes past his cheek into the bun.

Other guy sneers, “That’s mine.” Uh, no it isn’t. (And if you watch again, Daryl says “That’s mine” first.) Smeagol, aka other guy, argues over ownership of the rabbit, and even tries to hint that he knows about Beth being kidnapped. He’s all “Was it one of the little ones taken?” which made me think they’d been tracking the prison – or knew about Ty and the girls? IDK, what do you think?

Before Daryl can pull his knife, Joe is there to lend some Wisdom of Solomon – literally. Joe explains that they live by 12 year old boy rules now: CALL IT, IT’S YOURS. Basically you lick the cupcake to claim it, and what the hell, fellas? This is a terrible plan! Joe cuts the rabbit in half and gives Daryl the ass end. (Which frankly has more meat, dummies.)

Later, Joe asks Daryl if he’s sticking with them or what? Because or what is a really bad idea. Daryl just wants to find some decent people, maybe, which is hilarious to Joe. There aren’t any left! You don’t have to like people to live with them. (Daryl l thinks to himself, yeah I know. I grew up that way.)

The rules are simple: as stated already, you claim it, it’s yours. Don’t steal or lie. Simple. If you break those rules, you get a beating, the severity depending on a million factors that will never be in your favor. GOSH, SIGN ME UP.

Because the indoor cats are fixed, you feel me? Might as well hump a cushion. Wait, what?

Because the indoor cats are fixed, you feel me? Might as well hump a cushion. Wait, what?

They find a building to bed down for the night, give it a sweep and call everything before Daryl can. These guys are dicks, sorry. In the morning, Smeagol gets in Daryl’s grill, saying he stole the front half of the rabbit. Joe gets in there.

Joe: Did you?

Daryl: Nawsir, that part’s all sinew and brain. Ain’t looking to catch hydrophoby.

Smeagol: They STOLE it from us! Sneaky, tricksy, FILTHY hobbitses!

Joe: Yeah, you planted it on Daryl like a punk-ass bitch. *whistles to gang* Give him the boots: medium style.

Gang: To the almost death? Got it, boss! *goes overboard*

Daryl: So…you’re head bitch. Got it. (Thinks: I miss Rick.)

They leave a bit later. Daryl sees Smeagol beaten to a bloody pulp outside with an arrow in his head. Yeesh. Joe shares some moonshine with him and tells him the story of Where They’re Going after they pass a Terminus sign. But first!

Protip: Make ya own Hootch – great for trades, bargaining, forgetting about that nice white girl who sang you songs while you slept in a casket. Supplies: in a big ziplock bag, add 8 oranges, peeled and smashed. A can of fruit cocktail, all of it. A piece of bread. About 60 packets of sugar and 4 packets of ketchup. (Or hot sauce if you wanna be fancy with your pinky out. Look, do you wanna go hard, or go home? All right, then.)

Keep this somewhere warm (between your angel wing denim vest and your back, say) and let a little air escape here and there every day so it doesn’t blow up. After a week, drain out the sweet liquid – that’s Pruno, the finest hootch from Cell Block C. Mm, tastes like Mama’s kisses.

The worst thing about prison was the Dementors.

The worst thing about prison was the Dementors. And the toilet wine.

And now, the Tale of Joe’s Hurt Feelers.

Once upon a time a group of lovely, civilized fellas – us – found a house, fair and square. Turns out some jerky interloper was hiding in there, strangled one of our men while he was dropping a deuce, and left him to turn and attack us, sob sob! We clutched our pearls and cried when our friend became a Walker, and barely escaped with our lives. We were so…startled by this act of chicanery and disrespect that we now go in search of yon Bad Guy to make frowny faces at him.

Until he dies from it. The end!

One of the guys (I thought it was Len/Smeagol at first) saw Rick and remembers him – it’s a guy named Tony. They’re following “the guy’s” tracks on the tracks and Daryl’s vision tracks to a discarded candy wrapper that I’m meant to assume he knows is Michonne’s favorite. So he’s put two and two together, and it’s amazing how one person’s POV of a situation can be so clearly wrong (Joe’s). Daryl’s too smart to believe him, though.

My theory: Daryl is sticking with them for now because a) more people = safer, and b) he’s sticking close to find out what happened to Beth. No WAY these guys don’t know something about it. They know about Terminus, so they know stuff. Joe tells Daryl Terminus is a lie, though. Because they’re former bad guys – they won’t be accepted. (Oh, I bet they’d take you in, get you nice and tender, er, settled. And put you to work. Hmm.)

Glenn, Dr. Reddit, Tara, Rosita and Abraham’s Group

They all caught up to Glenn, back in his riot gear, and Abraham orders everyone to stop because “We’re going to rest in that tower–” Walker snarls from inside. “–we’re going to push on.” The Walker falls out of the tower and splats like a watermelon. In his haste to protect Dr. Reddit, Abraham knocks Tara over (JFC) and she has a twisted knee now. She toughs it out, thankfully, and they push on under the rule that Glenn wraps Dr. Reddit in his riot gear (does that mean Glenn will get a Science bonus for putting on Eugene’s things? +5 to Critical Thinking?).

Poor weight displacement there, Abraham. A gallon of water weighs 8 lbs, btw. That's a lot hanging on one shoulder. (Also: each person needs one gallon per day. He's carrying Eugene's. JFC)

Poor weight displacement there, Abraham. A gallon of water weighs 8pounds, btw.  That’s a lot hanging on one shoulder.  (Also: each person needs one gallon per day.  He’s carrying Eugene’s. JFC)

They get to a train tunnel. It’s dark. They don’t have penny battery-flashlights or pine-tar on the end of a stick for a torch. They can hear Walkers inside. And they can’t go over it, gotta go through it. (Or around it.) Tara and Glenn part ways to go through – the sign Maggie’s left outside for him is still wet – and the rest of them will go around and look for a vehicle. Dr. Reddit hits on Tara one last time (she’s GAY, bro -“Yeah, I know!” No, he didn’t.) They share supplies and split up.

Glenn and Tara talk really loudly in that tunnel, and-

Protip: shut the hell up in a tunnel! Your voice is bouncing all over the damn place, maybe waking up things that should stay asleep! Also, cover that doorway, there might be Ghouls in there. Or Stimpacks!

-find the source of the Walkers. It’s a Gabion Wall of Walkers from a cave in. I say start head stabbing and climb up. Oh, Glenn does just that, cool! They walk across the top of the wall and…shit, more Walkers are on the other side. Maggie isn’t one of them, so clearly she made it through somehow. Problem: they’re running low on ammo. Problem #2: Tara is a clutz. She loses her footing as they climb down and gets trapped. GREAT.

Meanwhile, Abraham’s band find a mini-van, dispatch the soccer mom inside, Dr. Reddit Rochambeau’s for Shotgun/Chewie/Navigation rights so Abraham can sleep while Rosita drives. She’s over his shit and agrees just to keep moving. After a series of left turns  (four make a circle, they stop at three), it’s revealed that Dr. Reddit calculated how long it would take Glenn and Tara to get through to where they have just stopped. “After I save the world, I still have to live with myself.”

Hmm, I’m still SERIOUSLY on the fence with this cat. Rosita isn’t sure if this is smart, which leads to a fight between Abraham and her, when Dr. Reddit looks shocked and shouts for their attention. WHAT?!!

Well, it’s not Glenn, because they’re still trying to get Tara loose as Walkers start figuring out how to get to them. Tara screams at Glenn to leave her (me, too) when a light shines on Glenn, Abraham’s voice shouts, “Get down!” and a hail of gunfire erupts, putting down all the Walkers.

AND THEN MAGGIE COMES OUT OF THE DARKNESS AND THERE IS MUCH REJOICING. Cutest apocalypse couple ever. Glenn introduces Tara with a few fibs to keep things from getting awkward (“Hey! Yeah, saw your dad beheaded. Got any water?”), Sasha and Bob are told about the plans to hit DC to “save the world,” when Dr. Reddit says they should stop at Terminus, load up on supplies, find a better car, and maybe recruit people to join them. And Abraham is all, “Okay, boss!”

I know I’m supposed to understand Abraham exists right now for the mission of getting him to DC but I don’t understand WHY. You can’t just TELL me I have to accept it, you need to SHOW me. And for now, it makes no sense to me, other than I’m supposed to just accept this. Well, I don’t.

Meanwhile, Glenn’s all, “Hey babe, I took this picture of you while you were sleeping,” and Maggie goes, “DELETE IT OR I DELETE YOU,” because no one wants a picture of them taken when they’re sleeping, also, she looks dead, also, she thinks they’ll never be separated again so why have that? Aww.

FINALLY. THEY REACH TERMINUS. Big enclosed red-brick series of buildings. And…they just open a gate and go in. Huh. There are plants growing along the street. (Haha, the production company totally went to Home Depot and bought annuals for their bright colors. WHY HYBRID MARIGOLDS? They are ugly and aren’t beneficial. HYBRID, don’t come at me with “you plant them to deter bugs…” You don’t plant HYBRID ones – they don’t have the same chemical makeup.)

They pass a sign that reads “Lower your weapons. You will be met. You have arrived at Terminus.” And that’s when I raise my weapon, look through the scope for snipers on buildings and slowly back away. NOPE. Nuh uh. There is NO ONE as they continue to just unlock gates and walk in. HOW. How is this a sense of security? Why can’t Walkers get in? Why aren’t they at the gates? HERE IS THE CHURCH, THERE IS THE STEEPLE, OPEN UP THE GATES AND WHERE ARE THE PEOPLE? They are in HIDING with TAZERS AND SEASONING SALT.

They pass some sunflowers nodding in the breeze (sunflower seeds make awesome oil that can be used as fuel, BTW) and finally, after rounding a corner, see some lady flipping meat on a giant grill. GET. OUT. GO. DO NOT STAY.

Sigh. The woman approaches them with a gentle smile, happy music plays, and this is our cue that shit is about to hit the fan. “Hi, I’m Mary. Let’s make you a plate.”

I DON’T WANT TO BE A PLATE, MARY, WHO AM I GOING TO BE FEEDING? Yeah, I’m on the cannibal/slaver train here. Use people for labor until they get et up, that’s what this town is for, says I. THERE’S SOMETHING ABOUT MARY, GUYS.

MAYBE THIS WAS THE FORESHADOWING AND NOT FOR LIZZIE?!?! Oh my god. Look at her mouth. Yep, I'm all aboard the Cannibal/Slaver train, TOOT TOOT.

THIS WAS THE FORESHADOWING AND IT WASN’T FOR LIZZIE!!! Oh my god. Look at her mouth! Two eyed, one braid, smiling purple people eater.

Theories – I AM SPOILER FREE, REMEMBER THIS: they have Hunters/Slavers (Joe is one of them) who bring in a tender work force/food source. They have spotters who note when people are approaching and everyone clears out, all but sweet-faced Mary. (There was a washing station, a planting station, etc. No people.) As your guard drops and you take your plate (IT’S PEOPLE! SOYLENT MARY IS PEOPLE.) you’re quietly circled, then tagged and bagged.

I DO NOT LIKE THIS. Also: WHERE IS BETH?! OH MY GOD WAS IT BETH ON THAT GRILL, NOOOOO!

Click! One. Episode. Left. It looks like a doozy, too. HOLD ME. (Remember: we are SPOILER FREE here. No comic book talk of what’s to come!!)

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31 Responses to Walking Dead 4.15 – Us

  1. *HOLD YOU UNTIL NEXT WEEK*

    Eugene is TOTALLY on the spectrum. Also zombie dinos? Kinda cool. I’m also with you on the whole Abraham thing. I need to be shown why he’s protecting Mr. Dr. Genius. Either that or mullet head needs to tell us how this thing started and how he’s going to fix it all.

    Finally, If I’m left waiting until October for my Caryl reunion, I may do bad things.

    • *CRAWLS INTO YOUR LAP WITH SHIVERS*

      I watched Talking Dead last night as the actor who plays Eugene was on, and he said he was basically doing an impression of his brother, someone who uses no inflection in his speech patterns. Which…that’s pretty ASD right there.

      HOW COOL ARE ZOMBIE DINOS?? I can honestly say that I never once considered that. LOVE. IT.

      Wow, am I happy not to be the only one wondering about Abraham’s dedication to Dr. Reddit. I need some ANSWERS. ALSO NEED: DARYL TO KNOW CAROL’S ALIVE.

  2. *HOLDS* I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IS TO COME (I spoil myself plenty by wiki-ing but haven’t actually read the comics and don’t remember if there’s even been a Terminus analogue mentioned) BUT I IMMEDIATELY THOUGHT SOYLENT PEOPLE TOO.

    Also I have deep shame because though I assumed my beloved Jeff Kober was lying about the hider-in-the-house stuff, my brain did not blink back to Rick. Of course this is the team of assholes he escaped from.

    THIS WILL END WELL.

    *draws ALL THE HEARTS around Glenn and Maggie*

    • I mean, SOYLENT GREEN. Beat the rush – eat people before you turn! RIGHT?! Gah.

      There was something a episode or two ago where it’s laid out that Jeff Kober’s group was the one in the house with Rick, I thought, or maybe I was just projecting? IDK, but YEAH. DARYL IS WITH THE GUYS RICK ESCAPED FROM. Oh my gosh, they are so close. SO CLOSE!! *bites nails*

      Maggie + Glenn = cutest End Times Couple EVAH.

  3. THE PAINTING! I didn’t even think about the painting! And if I am correct that you just dropped both a Monty Python reference AND a Metalocalypse reference up there, then you are my new best friend.

    • The fact that you KNEW that was a Metalocalypse (“Nickels is money too, guys!”) reference means we are NEW BEST FRIENDS FOREVER.

      I saw that painting again and FREAKED OUT. WOW. Wow.

  4. Is it bad that I laughed at the idea of Beth BBQ? I HAD NOT CONSIDERED THAT.

    I actually think that Terminus might be a good place only because we’re all so expecting it not to be. Plot twist! I can’t figure out the lack of security, though. That’s just bizarre. And that freaky painting could be Mary! – but Lizzie often wore her hair that way, too, and the painting looks like a young girl to me.

    Daryl, master tracker, totally recognized that candy bar as his buddy Michonne’s favorite, yep. (BTW, the way I heard it, Joe told them to take the beating of Len “all the way.”) I admit I am a little disappointed in Daryl and the way he’s regressed and has gotten pretty chummy with Joe by the end of the episode. I understand it, but it’s disappointing. I don’t think he’s necessarily doing it to get info about Beth, as you do. I think he’s just given up hope and regressed back to the familiar kind of dynamic he had pre-ZA with Merle and his cronies.

    I don’t really have an issue with Abraham and his seemingly blind following of Eugene, if only because we’ve seen so little of them and I’m assuming we’re going to get the back story of why Abraham believes in him so strongly. And I just like all of them. They’re fun. :-) I get the sense that Abraham is a man who really needs a mission, and this is the only one he’s got at the moment. And Eugene seems like his heart is in the right place, at least. My fifteen year old son LOVES this trio, by the way. He was all excited that they were going to be in this episode. *g*

    I’m excited we’re going to finally get some Rick in the finale! Although he doesn’t look too good in the previews. *bites nails* And Daryl has got himself in a real pickle, here, doesn’t he? I really hope we get to see Carol and Tyreese in the finale too, but I don’t know.

    • YOU DIDN’T THINK OF BETH BBQ? Honestly: tastes like chicken. (hahaha) I don’t ACTUALLY think it’s her, though. Too easy, too quick. I think she’s in a slave-situation, and I’m hanging onto that until proven otherwise.

      That would be AMAZING if Terminus proves to be a decent place. I am SHOCKED by their lack of security. (Except I’m not, because I think that’s how they getcha. Come a little closer, said the spider to the fly.)

      As for Daryl, I’m still holding onto him knowing what he’s about. If he’s chummy with them, it’s to survive and not because he actually LIKES them or feels comfortable with them. I didn’t see him drop his guard – not even when Joe was explaining about the house. He looked pretty nervously at that candy bar wrapper. (And the thing I said about Len’s beating was in order to use a pop culture reference. I should go back and make it clear that Joe was pretty adamant about “he’s out; you’re in.”)

      I have utter faith that we’ll get back story on Abraham – it takes a while on this show for everyone to get their moment. (I mean, we’re JUST finding out about Michonne!) We’re just putting people I DO care about (Glenn, now Maggie and Sasha) into potential harm’s way in order to protect someone who I don’t trust. (My son likes him, too, but my son has TERRIBLE taste, hahaha.)

      I REALLY NEED SOME RICK. AND CAROL. AND CAROL AND DARYL SEEING THE OTHER IS ALIVE. I have NO IDEA how that can happen in 44 minutes, but… IDK. It’s supposed to be hugely action-packed, so that could mean anything!

      • Man, I posted all over in the wrong places today. Sorry ’bout that.

        And oh, I never meant to imply that Daryl likes them AT ALL or really wants to be with them. But those guys are familiar to him. He knows how to deal with them. I just think that he’s pretty much given up hope at this point. He told Beth he thought everyone else was dead, and then he lost Beth, too. But it will be a great thing when he and Rick see each other again, though I imagine Daryl might have to keep his cover for a while if they capture one or more of the Richonne family. Hopefully Daryl will be able to finally (in his mind) save someone.

        Oh, and I will be on Spring break next week and have no idea when I’ll be able to watch the finale. OMG.

        • (No worries!! YOU NEED YOUR BREAK, I BET.)

          Those guys are TOTALLY familiar – those are Merle’s friends, his step-dad’s drinking buddies, the guys on the block. He knows just how to be around that and can slip into it with ease. (Poor Daryl.)

          I think seeing the candy bar wrapper was his realization they’re not all gone – the rest of the group. I’m still hoping he’s hoping he can find Beth, otherwise it’s just too dark and sad for me, I think.

          OH MY GOSH–I HOPE YOU DON’T GET SPOILED!!! I’ll be here waiting to talk to you when you finally get to it!

  5. I completely agree with you about Abraham and Eugene. Unless they give us some backstory, all I’m looking at is two blatant stereotypes pairing up for no good reason. But! I’m confident next week’s episode will clarify a few things.

    As for your Terminus theory, it’s equally logical and terrifying, and I would expect nothing less from the writers of this show. I just know they will set up a horrible scenario, and then give us the cliffhanger of all cliffhangers. I hate them and love them in equal measure.

    • Sorry – my comment posted twice. Feel free to delete. The page hung up, and when I refreshed it, it posted again.

      And as for horrible cliffhangers – yeah, I’m really afraid something terrible is going to happen to Carl at this point, if only from the look on Rick’s face in the preview.

    • “All I’m looking at is two blatant stereotypes pairing up for no good reason.” PRECISELY. That’s it precisely. The show is good about finally getting there, I just want it there NOW since Glenn and Maggie’s lives are on the line. (Not to mention Sasha!)

      Hahaha, I hate and love them in equal measure for those cliffhangers, too. GREAT LAURAS THINK ALIKE. :D

  6. I’m totally with you on the Soylent Mary train, as well as Maggie being served BBQ Beth without her knowledge. Which would be awesome, if the show would go there. But that might be too dark, even for TWD.

    Daryl is just biding his time at this point, I think. He’s with the group for protection, but once he realizes that they’re tracking Rick, Michonne and Carl, the Indoor Cat will come out and attack the Outdoor Cat. And whip his pussy. Heh.

    I like Rosita more, now that she’s dressed appropriately. And Eugene, blowhard that his is, is somewhat better. He’s totally a basement dweller who talks a big game, since he memorizes dictionaries and wikipedia pages.

    I like Glenn and Tara’s bonding, and his little glide over how he really found her, and who she’d been with before. And I’m glad Sasha is feeling a bit more optimistic about Tyreese. Too bad Maggie has STILL forgotten about Beth.

    Yeah, Terminus is really, really creepy, what with the unlocked gates and fences, and no one about. And Mary talks like a cultist.

    I wonder if Carol and Tyreese are already there, being fattened up for stew? Or are they behind the rest of these people? Oh, how I hope they’re behind. I don’t want to lose any more of that group.

    • I don’t think it’s Beth, truthfully. I think Beth is in a holding cage getting softened up for her turn. The show would put her in peril, let us SEE her in peril, and then serve her up – if they were to go that way. That’s how we’d get maximum Man Pain from Daryl. (Eye roll.) I want her to make it, if only to show how much harder she could become, how much tougher.

      LOL at Maggie forgetting about Beth! I think Maggie’s a one-track mind sort of girl, endlessly pursuing things until achieved. Now that she has Glenn, Terminus and Beth are next.

      I hope everyone is behind this group, too!! I HADN’T THOUGHT OF THE SCREWY TIME LINE. Oh my gosh. My hackles just rose.

  7. Allie "The Wife Norman Reedus Doesn't Know He Has"

    Oh lawdy lawdy lawdy. I. Just. Can’t. Take. Much. More.

    Let’s start with Daryl and his newfound Sons of Anarchy wannabe friends. Maybe a million years go, he would’ve fit right in. And there’s a little part of him that still does (like seeing the dead body outside of the warehouse and Beth’s baby doll voice telling him him to cover it up, didn’t you learn anything from Herschel?, but yet at the last minute the Dixon gene kicks in and he tosses the blanket away anyway). But I think he’s quietly biding his time, trading what little dignity he has left in his efforts to track “his real family” down.

    And dear god, I thought being a human in the ZA was bad, but apparently being a bunny is far worse. We have seen exactly one dog in four seasons of TWD, but how many bunnies have been seen nailed to boards? Slaughtered by psychopathic white Barbie girls? And butchered like Julia Child’s making stew for dinner over the campfire tonight? Actually, I think it’s just as dangerous to be a small white child. Sophie, The Gov’s Daughter from The Ring, Megan, Mica, Lizzie. Judith better start getting AP Survival Skill lessons from Carol. STAT.

    When Glenn realized Maggie was still alive and ran grinning down the train tracks, all I heard in my head was, “The hills are alive, with the sound of….”
    choose one of the following: 1) screaming bunnies 2) screaming dead white little girls 3) Tara inwardly thinking, “Shut up shut up shut up.”

    As for Terminus, this place is very, very bad. There are too many flowers. And what did we learn last week about flowers? Nobody. Wants. To. Look. At. Flowers.

    • “I think [Daryl's] quietly biding his time, trading what little dignity he has left in his efforts to track “his real family” down”

      YES YES. 100% yes from me. I totally think that, too. And it will be GLORIOUS to watch him cross the tracks to Rick’s side and tell those MoFos to scram.

      Ahahaha to Judith needing survival lessons from Carol. I bet they’ve already begun! You’re cracking me up. :D I AM HANDING THE KEYS TO THE PLACE OVER TO YOU FOR THE MENTION OF THE FLOWERS. Don’t look at the flowers!! Shit, I already did. (hears Carol sadly cocking her gun behind me)

  8. I am surprised that no one in the group suggested doing some recon on Terminus before blindly walking in there. Why do none of them have their spidey senses tingling?
    I loved Glen using the distraction of a zombie shadow puppet. And it worked, for a minute. Zombies, they so stoopid.
    I did not connect Mary to that picture, but I think you are right. Freaky!
    I am very worried for all of our people next week!

    • RECON. I mean, where have these people been?? One of them was in the damn Army! Then again, that might ruin whatever big reveal the writers have planned (but they should know better!).

      I didn’t connect Mary to that pic at all (I was convinced it was foreshadowing for Lizzie) but now? That’s all I can think!!

      NEXT WEEK IS GOING TO BE BRUTAL. Oh my god, my hands shake just thinking of Rick in that promo. D:

      • They should have totally done Recon, but I can also buy that they are just too exhausted in every way you can think of to be able to do that. Although, Sgt. Abraham should know better.

        Also Mary is played by Tasha Yar!

  9. Allie (the Wife Norman Reedus doesn't know he has)

    Also, two words: The Poncho. It needs to be returned to its rightful owner. Sorry, Mags.

    • (If you use the same email address, you won’t have to sign up each time! Just in case that’s a hassle for you. <3)

      I see it as Daryl and Maggie keeping it warm for him until they can give it back. :)

  10. LS-
    Re: Soylent Green. I had been saying the same exact thing!
    Those who arrive go nicely with endive.

    Thanks as ever for brilliantly recapping the ZA.

    -Donna

    • “Those who arrive go nicely with endive.” ALL THE POINTS TO YOUR COLUMN’S FINAL TALLY FOR THAT. Oh man, I’m actually jealous I didn’t think of that one. :D

      <3 (Thanks for always being a support!!)

    • Is that Soylent Green, or Soylent Greene?

      How about “Those who arrive get fried”?

  11. I am totally on board the cannibal train! How do you keep moving forward into this empty place (that looks like what they hoped the prison could be) and not have the hair on the back of your neck raising? Can we please have a 360 formation that puts Dr. Strangelove in the middle and everyone else prepared to pick off zombies/snipers/harvesters?

    Glenn has long been the smartest when it comes to the ZA even if he isn’t the hardest. So many people forget that he snuck in and out of LA all on his own pre first season to keep the camp going. You need a solution that doesn’t involve slaughter? He’s your go to guy.

    • I like the idea that Cindergal had above, where they were just so tired they didn’t think to do recon. (Which, if that’s the case, Abraham officially sucks at being Army Leader, ha! Watch your 6, Captain!)

      Glenn is the Ultimate Fanboy (the good kind) – he’s grown up with comics, games, all the things that create a virtual world that he spent his life inside – in between delivering pizza, of course. HE KNOWS THE BIG BOSS IS COMING. He is the best of all of us. THE BEST.

  12. Danni (AKA Swmbo's Stalker Danielle

    OMG Stoney!!! I had to stay away from here (because I didn’t have cable and and had not seen a single ep since we came back in February (but I mainlines all of them Thursday)). Now that I am caught up all I can say is OMG STONEY!! THIS SHOW!!1!!! I have NO idea how they’re going to remotely sew ANYTHING up by the end of this next EP and then we have to wait until October. And JUST!!! I don’t even know!!

    Mainlining everything up to now has left me…disconcerted. I kept going WHY Daryl?? Why? I could not understand why he’d stop looking for Beth, cold trail or not. And I could not understand why he’d fall in with Joe and his ilk. So reading your theories is very comforting.

    Here are some random thoughts. Glenn IS the best of all of us. Carl was starting to work on my nerves again (he redeemed himself a little in the beginning of this season) until the whole ‘I can’t’ and ‘I’m scared’ part. My heart bleeds for Michonne. I think Mikka would have made it if it weren’t for her nutter butter sister. My heart bleeds for Carol too. My roommie and I both question whether Eugene actually knows anything, we think that ‘scientist with all the answers’ is a good survival ploy. That said, I enjoy his nerdiness (<–apparently that's not a word). And we all agree that Terminus is not going to end well for anyone.

    It drives me crazy (in a good way) to know they are all within 10 miles of each other yet still separated. And it was fun trying to figure out the timeline and who was where when.

    I don't know….this show takes me to the edge of my seat and leaves me unsettled for a long time. Anyway, I will be quiet now, except to say I absolutely adore you, HDJM, these recaps. I fangirl YOU, Stoney!!

    • HIIIIIIII! Oh, how awesome that you got to suck it all down with out waiting in between eps, though! /silver lining

      I am so happy to hear that I’m not the only one thinking Eugene might be faking it as a survival technique! Time will tell, but for now I’m hanging on to my skepticism. IT’S WHAT WILL KEEP ME ALIVE. :D

      Don’t be quiet!! I love the chatter! And I can’t wait for tomorrow’s ep so we can all flail together. COME BACK AND WE’LL HOLD HANDS (metaphorically) AND FREAK OUT! <3 <3 <3

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