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Laura Stone hopes to one day throw the greatest party ever: cocktails with John Waters and Amy Sedaris [where she does a spot-on Paul Lynde impression], all while they wait for Chris Colfer to arrive with the crudites. Also there will be a cheese ball and Twister. [@StoneyboBoney] Head Writer, Owner
Sam H breaks hearts and jaws every Tuesday night at the fight club behind Taco Bell. [@allighater]
Liz B is an enigma, and most of us aren’t sure if she’s even real. First rule of knowing Liz, you don’t talk about knowing Liz. Will allow direct eye contact from Tom Hardy and subsists on a steady diet of puppy slobber, tacos and Red Velvet cake.
Janey Ford sensibly fled the heinous constraints of academia so she could follow her true loves: writing, pie-making, American Dad episode marathoning, and pretending to look for real work. She credits Charles in Charge and Mr. Belvedere for her unreasonable desire for a snarky manservant with whom to have madcap adventures, and hopes one day to post a recap as popular as Bob Loblaw’s Law Blog. [@heyjaneyford]
Vinnie Chaffee was raised on Yan Can Cook, The Frugal Gourmet, and Perfect Strangers. She is now a Liberal Arts major. Who works in a cosmetics store. Glamour girl by day, nerd by night, she watches enough genre television to cause people to side-eye her at parties. Sketchy TV is acceptable, however she will not indulge your desire to wear periwinkle eyeshadow and fuchsia lipstick simultaneously. [@nottheribbons]
Josie Morin thinks life is too short to be unhappy. Dude. Let’s laugh. Also, she loves McDonald’s.
Laura M was raised on a high-fat diet of new wave music and Canadian political rhetoric. All things considered, she turned out pretty well. She currently spends the majority of her time writing, and yelling at the people on TV to do what she says. They haven’t listened yet, but she lives in hope. [@laura_mcvey]
Sophie writes how she talks: be warned. Her hobbies include historiography, gay detectives, and wincing psychological insight. Sophie is small and scholarly, and likes hooting at the television. If Jeremy Hardy proposed, she would say yes. Have some Twitter. [@clamorousvoices]
Melissa Francis prefers the term Milf to Cougar. Likes her beer dark, her men geeky, and her porn from the seventies. She’d rather be on the beach and she’s never going to get there if folks like you don’t buy her books. (Seriously, she writes books.) You can find her online or visit her author site. [@MelissaFrancis]
Samantha S is a museum professional in Upstate New York. When she’s not spending her time talking about dead people, wearing white protective cotton gloves, and lusting after various Founding Fathers, she likes to play video games, drink beer, and sing along with Johnny Cash. As a Boston Red Sox fan, she’s very familiar with true heartbreak and soul-crushing devastation. Not that she’s bitter or anything. [@teawithvoldy]
Sally R tried to live the normal life for years, but gave up the city and moved to the mountains where she can fling herself down snow-covered hillsides, experiment with high-altitude baking in her craptastic oven, and walk her beloved Saint Bernard. She believes in the power of chocolate that is 60% cocoa or darker, Irish whiskey, and the love of big dogs. [@ColoradoSal]
Melody O staggers about crying, “Real life? Real life?? La la la la I can’t hear you!”
Michaela Schmid was abandoned in a child in an elderberry grove and raised by hedgehogs. Now she spends her days producing delightful handicrafts and at night she stalks the backstreets scavenging for berries. She is likely to turn up anywhere there’s a nice murder. [@pernickety]
Jenn Tharp used to pretend that the standardized tests she was taking in elementary school were actually recruitment tests for NASA. As she’s now a student and freelance fiction writer with the occasional odd job, her astronaut aspirations didn’t exactly pan out, but she still gets her space fix through marathons on Discovery Science and a lot of British scifi. Her summer cottage is the Hub, her other car is a TARDIS, etc. [@jenn_tharp]