Previously! Thought before we get into it: someone somewhere mentioned that Podrick had shown proficiency with regards to knowing banners, sigils, etc, so why on earth didn’t he notice House Tully passing? My guess, but I couldn’t make it out on my giant-ass tv screen for certain, is that the sigil waving on those flags was Littlefinger’s newly chosen sigil: the Mockingbird. Podrick wouldn’t know about it. Thoughts? Well, save them until the end, we have VERY IMPORTANT STUFF to talk about first!
A MAN needs some chapstick.
Like how Braavos steampunk-moustrap was back on the map! And it’s because Arya is finally entering the city! (Love the lore about the Titan coming to life and smashing enemies in days of old. I’m going to love these books when I finally get to read them, aren’t I?) And hey, there’s your reminder that I am UNSULLIED. Do not—I beg of you—discuss the books here, neither overt nor veiled. Be cool. Literally the rest of the internet is for you book readers. But down here, it’s our [non-reader] time. It’s our time down here. [Obligatory Goonies reference] Continue reading
Previously! OH MY GOD YOU GUYS. YOU GUISE!! YOUS GEZE I AM SO HAPPY THE SHOW IS BACK GAME OF THRONES IS BACK AND MY TRIBE IS BACK AND THE OPENING HAD THE EYRIE!! And Winterfell wasn’t a ruin! OHO. I have no idea what that means, I’m just excited. Wait. Waaaaaaait.
FLAYED MAN ALERT!
Le gasp!! BOLTONS! [/Newman!] Continue reading
[Previously!] Okay, the show hinted that someone we care about will die in this finale, which I hate knowing, because then I’m too stressed to just take the episode in. No, I imagine every interaction as the last. (Which yeah, I know that’s what they want.) You know what I want?
MORGAN!!! AND I GOT IT!
Someone spent some time on Coruscant for their Jedi training. [DID YOU NOT KNOW HOW BIG OF A NERD I AM UNTIL JUST NOW?] I pretty much made light-saber noises every time Morgan pulled out that quarterstaff.
I DO NOT ACCEPT YOUR SYMPATHY TUNA NOODLE, MADAM.
Previously! Deanna and NPR Chairperson Reg mourn their dead son by listening to Trent Reznor, as you do. Reg is moved to tears by the ’90s emo, and I’m crying, too, Reg. Because Carol made you guys a sympathy tuna casserole, with a “We’re truly sorry for your loss” card, which Deanna promptly sets on fire. She then leaves the tuna noodles out on the porch, and that’s how you get ants, Deanna. Continue reading
Previously! Father Gabriel is setting up a new chapel. Alexandria found work for him, too. A gift of strawberries from someone named Rosemary has him freaking. He tears a page out, then more and more, ripping the book into shreds. DAMN SON, YOU LEFT HARD.
Fun fact! Rosemary mythologically is a symbol for remembrance of the dead. Can’t stop remembering the people you locked out of your church, Gabriel? And strawberries symbolize purity, passion and healing. I guess there won’t be healing as long as he can still remember his own dead, huh?
But enough about him. I came here to chew bubblegum and get turned on by Daryl Dixon on a motorcycle, and I’m all out of bubblegum. [dirty bass line] Continue reading
GUYS. I had jury duty, and they picked me. So sorry for the delay but an actual person’s LIFE WAS ON THE LINE. Who cares, let’s talk about cookies and buttons! [Previously!]
HEY MY GUESS IS THIS IS FORESHADOWING TO ADULTERY, WHO’S WITH ME?
We open with Sasha looking at some pictures of white people enjoying themselves. Seriously? They couldn’t do a sweep of empty houses and remove personal memorabilia? And were there no people of color in Alexandria? Welp, she can’t sleep, so she goes to the gun libraries (Republicans are probably salivating at that concept), checks out her sniper, promises Olivia that if she gets a boar (pfft, she’s hunting Walkers) she’ll make sure to send her prosciutto seeds (a leg)… Continue reading
Please note Dr. Mullet standing with no weapon in the middle. He should fit right in!
Previously! We open with our group approaching the gate at Alexandria, which opens for them. Carl sees a young girl watching them from one of the damage houses at the entrance. Love interest, spotted! Also spotted: opossum in the trashcan, which Daryl quickly puts down, telling the guys at the gate, “We brought dinner.” Ahahaha. Continue reading
Is it just me, or does he look like a young Lorne Michaels?
Previously: They meet a Jehovah’s Witnesses with Good News.
The cleanest man in the Apocalypse is now in the hands of Sasha and Maggie. Or is he? Continue reading
Can you imagine how bad they all smell right about now? Probably can’t smell it anymore it’s so bad. Sorry, I get distracted easily.
[Previously] I have to tell you guys, it’s getting really hard to stick with it. I mean, I’m doing this out of my love for the show, and the show is making me fall in love with a passel of kittens and then drowning them in front of my crying face. This week was just rough. But I’m here. And Maggie pretty much sums it up: “How much longer we got?”
I don’t know, Maggie. I don’t know. Continue reading
I just like reminding everyone of how much I love Michonne. This is unrelated to the episode. …OR IS IT?
Hello hello!! Welcome back from the hiatus, the one where we questioned sticking with this ugly world, because everything good seems to get snuffed out. Well, at least we still have the moral compass that is Tyrese.
Whew. Continue reading