Category Archives: Television

Walking Dead 5.2 – Strangers

Dynamic Duo! Seriously, there's nothing these two can't do.

Dynamic Duo! Seriously, there’s nothing these two can’t do.

Previously! We are moving at a fast clip into the next Big Bad. Well, except for all the slo-mo Hero Walking we did in the beginning. Plus, there were loads of scriptures sprinkled throughout this episode, which was fitting seeing as we’ve done added ourselves a preacher man to the group. Last, Dr. Mullet allowed me to use my most favorite quote of all time. So it’s a pretty big day for me. Let’s Hero Walk. Continue reading

Sleepy Hollow 2.04 – Go Where I Send Thee…

sh 201 promo image abbie ichabod branches

Previously on Sleepy Hollow, evil coins, evil doings, evil sheriffs.  EVIL.

Someone must have felt the fog machine guy for Sleepy Hollow wasn’t getting enough chances to show us the ol’ razzle dazzle. Because when a little girl in pajamas walks in a daze from her family’s historical mansion (down a fancy-schmancy spiral staircase, no less), outside and through the gate, she is surrounded by a veritable sea of lovely foggy night. Good job, fog machine guy! Wait, get back inside your house, seemingly-hypnotized kid! Continue reading

Walking Dead 5.1 – No Sanctuary

"HEYYY, batter-batter-suh-WING, batter!"

“HEYYY, batter-batter-suh-WING, batter!”

Welcome back, survivors! [Previously] Oh, how I’ve missed being filled with utter despair… Which is to say, hooray for having our show back! If any of you are first-timers here, let me break it down for you: one, I cuss. A lot. I get excited, it can’t be helped. Two, this site is dedicated to shows we love. If you want to insult, tear down, or be snarky, this ain’t the place for you. The world is full up on negativity, and I just want to get excited about cannibals, Walkers, and proper weapons care with friends, okay? Okay.

And don’t think for a second that we’re not going to talk about Carol being the best of all of us, by which I mean that she is becoming Daryl Dixon. Conversely, Daryl? He’s becoming old school Carol. Let’s check in at Terminus. Continue reading

Supernatural 10.01 – Black

Okay, okay, I know last season I just checked out on y’all, but I’m back and hopefully both the show and myself have spanked our inner season 9 moppets and are ready to move on. And after a very informative, if arguably oddly soundtracked, “Road So Far” (great song, but just because it has the words “soul” and “sinner” in it doesn’t make it apropos) we’re ready to hit the ground. Continue reading

Sleepy Hollow 2.03 – Root of All Evil

sh 201 promo image abbie ichabod branches

Previously on Sleepy Hollow:  Ichabod and Abbie tried to stop a binding ceremony on Katrina; Frank Irving was treated wretchedly (I will never forgive anyone about this), and there’s a new sheriff in town.  For real.

This week!  It’s time for spooky DIY crafts! Oh look, it’s an adorable exact tiny replica…of Tarrytown Psychiatric. Interesting choice. Henry Parrish finishes painting the replica and smiles. Well, that certainly doesn’t bode well.  Continue reading

The Bridge 2.13 – Jubilex

the bridge 2 season 2

Previously on The Bridge:  Marco tried to protect Romina while Hank and Sonya took on Eleanor and a larger conspiracy.

Though Hank tells Sonya to wait for back-up to pull over the van she’s following, he flags down the semi he’s trailing despite his injuries. When the driver escapes with a shotgun, Hank fires his gun. In one of the best shots this season, he peers under the truck to keep an eye out for his adversary, and sees a liquid dripping that looks to be gas or oil. When a limp hand falls down, though, it’s clear the dripping was blood. Hank is a scary badass, y’all.

The truck cargo? Of course it’s tons of drugs. But surprise, it’s also Steven Linder, somehow still twitching and alive despite being Robles taking him down at close range last ep. “Holy shit,” Hank says. Omg, Hank, SAME!

Continue reading

Sleepy Hollow 2.02 – The Kindred

sh 201 promo image abbie ichabod branches

Previously on Sleepy Hollow, we thought the show was jerking us around! But it was only Purgatory jerking reality, Ichabod, and Abbie around. Plus Benjamin Franklin was a merry nudist puzzle-poser of an encrypting funster. HISTORY!

The Headless Horseman takes Katrina to a ritual circle with fire where, Henry tells her, they will “complete the ceremony” bonding the two of them. There’s wrist binding and hand cutting (this show loves its ceremonial hand-slashing, tbh). “You must be like him in every way,” Henry explains to Katrina as the Horseman takes a wide swing at her pretty head with his axe and…

“You were having a nightmare?” Abbie asks Ichabod as he startles awake. Yeah. So. I’d like to nominate myself as current Queen of Stating the Obvious, as last night I said aloud, “You know, this show likes to mess with our heads,” as though this was actual newsContinue reading

The Bridge 2.12 – Quetzalcoatl

the bridge 2 season 2

Previously on The Bridge: Cartels! The DEA versus the CIA! Badassery!

Monte Flagman, the remarkably sanguine ear to the cartel lawyer, takes in his cowboy boots to get the murder blood cleaned off of them. Sheesh, he can only spare a few coins for Little Lupe who has leukemia? Surely you could stuff some dirty drug money dollars in that charity collection can, Monte.

After feeding the skeptical boot cleaner a lie about antelope hunting, Monte finds Eleanor waiting for him out back, fondling the shoemaking stabbing tools. Continue reading

Sleepy Hollow 2.01 – This Is War

sh 201 promo image abbie ichabod branches

If there’s anything we learned from last season of Sleepy Hollow, it’s that all the little pesky problems of life — you know, being raised from the dead, having your former best friend turn into a horseman of the apocalypse, witnessing your wife suffering in Purgatory, losing your badass new best friend and fellow Witness to the end of days in a demonic exchange, and finding out your Sin Eater son who is twice your age is now the embodiment of War, that kind of stuff — all of these flies in the ointment can get better if someone just gives you a cupcake.

But not just any cupcake! Abbie Mills gives Ichabod Crane the most splendiferously patriotic cupcake as a surprise! “I shall consider myself punk’d,” Ichabod says sullenly, asking about Abbie’s ‘surprise’ party, “why must your error celebrate terror with dessert?” Um, because of the deliciousness?

Hey now, hang on a sec, you say — as I did last night — this isn’t the way last season ended. What about Ichabod being trapped by Henry in the coffin? Or Abbie getting shut in Purgatory to rescue Katrina? And though things looked bad for Jenny and Katrina, we didn’t actually see them die, as Abbie and Ichabod seem to feel they did in tonight’s ep. Well, hang on to your patriotic cupcakes, friends, because we’re in the middle of an it’s-all-a-dream moment; clever that Sleepy Hollow is, though, we’re just as befuddled at first as Abbie and Ichabod are about which reality is which.  Continue reading

The Bridge 2.11 – Beholder

the bridge 2 season 2

Previously on The Bridge, Marco and Sonya rushed to save Hank, Eleanor went from critical condition to creepy torturer, and Fausto got hold of something Sebastian wants to protect.

Fausto Galvan and his wacky assistant Obregon show us the banality and awkward humor of evil in a clever and uncomfortable opening scene. They fuss at each other while filming a threatening video for Sebastian Cerisola, showing his daughter Romina at gunpoint. Fausto’s menacing words about how Sebastian “forced me to remove my gloves and close my fist” are both undercut and made creepier by Obregon’s eager “accion!” at the start and comments on the props. Whoops, Fausto has an unloaded gun at first, haha! Let’s just replace that with a loaded pistol and aim that at Romina’s head, shall we? *shudders*  Continue reading